Friday, February 1, 2013

Saint's Prayers and God's Mercy



Saint’s Prayers and God’s Mercy
I have been granted permission to share with readers the situation that resulted in my requesting prayer for a sister in Christ.  I join her in thanking those who prayed on her behalf. 



This sister’s testimony spoke to me as well.  It seemed that we were both facing ‘giants’, howbeit, under different circumstances.  The Lord is glorified through her testimony. The title of this article was inspired by the her letter.


Excerpts from email:


“As you know from my last email, I was hospitalized this past weekend due to heart palpitations and a racing heart.  As it turned out, the cancerous tumor in my breast became infected and that infection spread to my blood.  This is why my heart was going erratic.  To resolve the issue with my heart, they had to first resolve the infection.  My body had become what they call sepsis.

During my hospital stay, I was being seen by seven doctors: Internal medicine doctors, infectious disease doctors, cardiologists, etc.  One big draw was that (as one doctor shared) it is very rare that they see cancerous tumors developed to the extent that mine is (because most people use surgery & chemo to resolve them before it gets to that point)."


“However, my temperature was increasing and my breast was still red and hot from infection.  When I asked yesterday, they told me they could not discharge me until the infection was under control.  I asked if they could just send me home with an antibiotic prescription, but the doctor said that the antibiotic goes into our system better via IV.  They said I would need to stay as long as it takes until the infection was gone, even a week more possibly.”


“Yet, starting at around 11:00 am today, the doctors started coming to me one by one and giving me permission to leave!!!  The redness of my breast had gone and my vitals and blood work were back within normal range in terms of the infection and heart function.  I was elated!!!!! 

Thank you so much for your prayers!!!  If you could, please also share my immense gratitude and appreciation for the brethren who interceded on my behalf.  I know it is the prayer of the saints and the mercy of God which prevailed and heard my plea.”


“As I talked to the Lord on my hospital bed this morning, I asked Him why I had to go through this.  I was dumbfounded when He revealed the answer to me: FEAR.  There were 2 things I was fearful of and the Lord was putting His finger on those things.

I had never verbalized it nor really acknowledged it, but deep within I had formed the belief that the moment I would have to go to the hospital, it would be the beginning of the end for me.  I felt that having to be hospitalized would mean that I was going to die and not live; that God was not going to heal me.”
  


“Therefore, when my husband kept insisting that we go to the Emergency Room this weekend, I kept resisting.  I wanted to just wait on the Lord to take care of the situation and not go to the hospital.  I was afraid to go, somehow believing that would mean my death.  Yet here I was, sitting on the hospital bed, and I was not dead.  


Instead, the doctors were going to let me go home.  My fears (although I was not really aware of them until this morning) were proven unfounded.  The hospital had not been a sign that God was letting me die.  Rather, He was with me through the whole thing, even through my worst fears.  I had let fear create a reality for me that God had to show me was not true.”

“Second, I was fearful of the ridicule of men; and that was pride.  When God told me not to take chemo or radiation 5 years ago, the doctors all assumed I was some sort of nut.  They documented in my medical records that I would not take the treatments necessary because I "believed that God told me not to".  


Their assessment of me and of my God as reflected in those records was nothing short of mocking.  While it was easy to stand against this when the cancer was gone, once the cancer came back, it became harder.  I felt like a fool under the glare of medical professionals telling them about my God and the importance of me being obedient to Him when I was standing there with a body deformed by cancer."


“I didn't want anyone to see my breast, to see the tumor, and start pressuring me again about the chemo.  I was trying desperately to believe the Lord and did not feel that I could stand under the repeated assaults of doctors telling me I would die if I did not do as they stated.  So what did God do about this fear?  He had doctor after doctor and nurse after nurse come examine me and look at the breast.  


While I never became comfortable with it, after a while it just didn't hurt as much as it did initially.  I explained again and again during my hospital stay why I had not done the chemo/radiation and why I was not willing to consider it now.  I had to obey the Lord and trust Him, no matter what.  They all stared at me in disbelief as if I was not right in my mind.  


Yet, I told the Lord this morning, "God, what else can I say?  What I have told them is the truth.  Yet, it makes me look like a fool."  That is when God asked me, "Did my Son care that He had no reputation amongst men?  That He was despised and rejected?  Is the servant greater than his Master?"  Then I felt ashamed.  


I realized that my problem was not wanting to be despised by men (pride).  I wanted my healing from cancer to be a testimony to the Glory of God, but I had not been willing to be mocked while waiting for that healing to be manifested.  I thought of how the men and women likely mocked Noah as he built the ark.  


I thought about how Moses' people likely mocked him when he first came back with a message of being their deliverer. I understood that humility was of the utmost importance if the power of God is going to be available to me (for healing) and through me (to help reach others). 

It is necessary for me to experience the ridicule, the mocking, the being made a fool of for the sake of the Gospel so that every ounce of flesh and the pride of life can be put to death (so that I do not pervert the gifts of God).


I just wanted to say how relevant your recent post on fear was for me.  It always truly amazes me when God puts the same thing on His children's hearts.  When He showed me how He let this hospitalization occur to address my fear in these areas, I thought about your story of the caterpillar.  

God had to knock into these fears if He is to use me in the days to come.  As I spoke with Him this morning, I felt Him saying, "Now what else do you think I am unable to do?"  Clearly the answer is, "Nothing, Lord." 


(End of first excerpts)


My answer back to her was brief, but I did share that she was not alone.  Below are excerpts from correspondence (permission granted to post as led).  I wrote:


“He is faithful...listen sister, the 'reason' the Lord led me to post about Faith (the caterpillar) who had to 'overcome' the mountains of 'fear' and 'unbelief' is because I too, had fallen into both of those myself.  I understood why He was telling me to post them...the messenger gets the message first!  I had to repent of these...yes, our faith is being tried but the enemy is seeking to steal/kill/destroy faith.”


"I too was in fear and He showed me recently as well...
My fear began with thoughts of 'doubt', it became fear and fear held hands with unbelief.  I was doubting that I had ever heard from God; questioning if I am even a true child...it goes deeper, but the Lord had to reveal things in me.

It's a purging time sister and I now welcome it...I have repented truly. 

He's been doing a work inside me, purging etc and I've had to take time off the computer and more in prayer and listening.  However, i will be continuing on about deception.  I am grateful to Him for His purging; it has not been easy; been rather painful to open my eyes to some of my hidden faults that must be purged!”


The sister and friend responded back:


“Your fear Sister was the same as mine.  I was not afraid of dying if going to the Hospital, but it was the fear that this confirmed I had not heard the Lord.  He was not going to heal me and I was not His child.
 

The hospital was like being turned over to the hands of man, representing to me that the Father did not consider me His own.  "See, you do not know the Lord and He does not know you.  He is not going to heal you, because you do not belong to Him, but rather you will die."  


These are the words that the enemy whispered to me time and again.  It was such a heart wrenching joy when the Lord made me realize those words had sown down into my soul and that they were LIES!  Every since then I have tried to be very vigilant in casting down those false accusations from the accuser of the brethren.”


(End of excerpts)
Many that I have spoken with (and I do mean many) are expressing how they have been experiencing what many say (in various ways) is a test of their sanity, as well as fear on different levels.  Faith is being challenged as never before.  The Lord, in His wisdom and sovereignty is exposing our weaknesses.




It is more of the refiner’s fire, and the intensity of the fire has been increased seven times more.  It is necessary because as we grow, there are parts that must be pruned, cut away, so new growth may bring forth good fruit.  The beauty of this fire, as uncomfortable as it may be, is to correct, cleanse and purify us.


Flesh is a great pretender.  Just when you think it is dead, it rises up, ‘Surprise! I’m back.’  We will fight flesh until the day we leave these temporary vessels. It is why we are told to pick up our cross daily and die to self.  Whether we are as babes in Christ or mature believers, we will make mistakes.  

Every single one of us have areas that must be purged, whether we admit it or not.  None of us have arrived, yet we strive to overcome.  The Lord is faithful to help us, particularly if we lay down pride and admit we have fallen short of His glory.




The Lord is purging His people, revealing things in us that we would rather not be there at all.  It is not something to be ashamed of, unless of course, we refuse the work He is doing in us.  I think pride is something we all must overcome, as it is part of the fallen nature. 


There are far too many of us experiencing the same kind of turmoil to pass it off as an individual shortcoming.  The Father is purging His people, answering our prayers to be without spot or blemish. He knows what He is doing and it is good.  


For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive; and plenteous in mercy unto all them that call upon You.  [Ps 86:5]


Behold, You desire truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part You shall make me to know wisdom. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. [Ps 51:6, 7]


I present this in closing, from one of the writings the Lord gave me.


Do Not Fear the Darkness


You have laid me in the lowest pit, in darkness, in the deeps. Lover and friend have You put far from me, and my acquaintance into darkness.  [Ps 88:6, 18]


When the darkness comes upon you, as you go through the dark season, I shall shine My light upon your heart and reveal the secret things that you have not known are there. Fear not; neither be dismayed or confounded. Be strong and of good courage. I work in the darkness; I work in ways you cannot see.

Your emotional condition is not necessarily your heart condition. Allow this piercing of the heart, for out of the wound shall pour forth all that festers and infects you. Surrender it into My hands and I cleanse, purify and heal you; you shall have a new heart.   


I shall shine My light into the darkness, and shall shine light upon your heart. Light overpowers darkness. Then shall you see clearly; then shall you know My glory in the face of My Son.


My people must go through these dark times. Many have despaired, been troubled, perplexed, cast down and cried out to Me. Those whom I have raised up mightily (in days gone by) went through the darkness that came upon them. They cried out to Me, yet felt so helpless, alone and abandoned, not understanding the times of My silence. If you fall, rise back up again. Repent and believe; let your faith hold fast to Me.


Genuinely repent and believe, forgive and die to self; then shall you be raised up and become the new man. I shall have a holy people, without spot or blemish. Yea and if you fall, I say rise up, rise up again, and cry out to Me.

For a just man falls seven times, and rises up again: but the wicked shall fall into mischief. [Pro24: 16]



So shall it be with My people who persevere, who go through the dark seasons, who cry out in repentance, if there be need in any area for repentance. Yea, cry out to Me and I shall strengthen you as you go through purging and purification.


But thanks be to God, which gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. [2Cor 15: 57]

for His glory

Bonita               dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com

(UPDATE- NOTE* - On the prayer request, as well as this article, I am adding the update. As of AUGUST 2013, in speaking with Mia, she is HEALED of cancer, not in remission but HEALED, no sign of cancer. Glory to God alone!)

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