Never Give Up HOPE

screenshot--credit_Yuang Xu

The Love that Strengthens and Never Fails

With the help of the precious and Holy Spirit, I put together a little heartfelt package to inspire, encourage and help others, God willing. It reflects where I’ve been spiritually, fighting hard – alone with Jesus. It is good to have a friend or two who understand, but Jesus is the friend we ALL need. He never wearies or tires of us…unless we are ungrateful complainers or worse.

Even then, He will draw us to steer us toward repentance so that He can forgive us. However, He never forces anyone, and He will not contend forever.

When darkness surrounds the soul, there is a silent knowing that other brethren are going through the same thing. It doesn’t need to be spoken, but it does help to talk things out. Sometimes everyone needs comfort, needs to be heard, needs to be understood.

We are in a real war, and the enemy is relentless. His fury is immeasurable; his hatred is bloodthirsty and insatiable. Yet, we have an Advocate who has overcome the enemy and has overcome the world [Jn 16:33] We all long for the days that this spiritual warfare with Satan/Lucifer and his legions is finally over. Christ is the Victor.

We are one ‘Body’ in Christ Jesus/Yeshua, who is the Head. The Body cannot exist or live without the Head – how beautiful and wise are the ways of the Lord.

A Raging Battle

I was looking for a song, one of the old-fashioned hymns, like the Old Rugged Cross, or It Is Well (With My Soul). There was a need to worship the Lord through music, and to focus upon Him. I wanted my heart to be grateful, not wallowing in self-pity. Amazing Grace popped up, a classic. However, just before I clicked on the familiar original version, an extended title caught my eye. “Amazing Grace Fell Like Rain” – intriguing.

I searched out the title and lyrics on Google, and in truth, I could easily have echoed the words for what I have been struggling with these past several months. How many times does one go through a dark night of the soul. I reckon it depends on the soul, depends on the number of times a tragedy in life has struck, or a spiritual crisis has taken place. It depends on several factors.

Now for a true confession. Depression is something I have fought for a long time, off and on throughout my life, but now there is Jesus. My Saviour makes all things bearable. I can run to Him with all my cares, concerns, hurts, frustrations, anger – everything.

The garment of praise is worn for the spirit of heaviness, yet like a trustworthy boomerang, and for reasons unknown, depression returns. Praise Jesus for His patience, understanding, and for being a solid Rock.

Despite the heaviness, there truly is a deep peace and an untouchable inner joy knowing Jesus and abiding in Him, clinging to Him like healthy grapes cling to a strong vine. He truly is an unexplainable strength, wholly reliable. He is our hope, our strong tower, our shield. He is everything good, pure and holy.

The name of the Lord [Adonai] is a strong tower; the righteous run into it and is safe. [Prov 18:10]

The lyrics that will be posted further below summed up a fair chunk of what has been going on within me, deep below the surface (or perhaps, not so deep), behind the sometimes-pasted smile and sometimes forced lighthearted-sounding words. I must say that I am extremely grateful to have a good friend in the flesh…two good friends, sisters in Christ.

Yet in the Spirit, Jesus is the best friend of anyone who will draw close and abide in Him (be one in Him, and He will be one in you), just as Jesus/Yeshua was in the Father, and Abba (the Father) was in Christ Jesus.

We Must Learn to Trust

Jesus is LORD Of the battle

When we pass through turbulent waters that churn up waves of hopelessness, or stand in the fiery furnace of the world's most heated troubles presented by vicious tyrants, we can be confident that the same Lord God [Adonai] who assured us that He is the same yesterday, today, and forever [Heb 13:8] promises never to leave us. He stays very close to us, even when He is silent.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you, and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you: when you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon you. [Is 43:2] KJV

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not to your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct your path. [Prov 3:5, 6]

The flesh will remain imperfect until the day we are changed (all born-again, Spirit-filled believers), in the twinkling of the eye, on the day of resurrection or the rapture, whichever the Lord chooses.

The best thing I ever did was to finally surrender, wholly and gladly! Commitment was not surrender, but I did not differentiate for some time. I had to learn. Surrender would be the best move anyone, including you, can make.

If you already have, bravo! Whether I want to or not, I will let you down. Others will let you down (disappoint/fail), and you will let others down too. It is all part of the fallen, carnal nature. Even when we do not intend to ever let anyone down, it does happen in this life. It is the human factor. Yet, with great confidence I can assure you that Jesus (Yeshua) will never let you down.

Guaranteed there will be times in this life that stuff happens and we do not get why God has allowed it, why He did not stop it… especially when we know He surely could have. He is God after all. We read the Word and we think we understand and know God. Yet when something happens in our life that tears us apart, or that we do not want to happen, more often than not, we cry out, “Why?! Why didn’t You do something? Why did You allow this? What kind of loving God allows this?”

We might wonder what we did to deserve this punishment. Surely it must be punishment for something, or else it just seems cruel. It might ‘feel’ like Yahweh is displeased with us and that is why the tragedy happened. We try to rationalize, try to make sense out of tragedy or calamity.

We will search the heart for sin, any sin, all sin. He must be punishing us. Why else must we suffer this pain (whether external (physical), internal (mental, emotional, spiritual), or both).

Why else are some of us unable to walk, or some unable to move, or others still unable to see, or hear. Why else did this marriage fall apart? Why else did this person get sick, or that person die, or, or, or…? We may accuse Jesus/God of being unfair, unjust, or worse – unloving.

We may ask Him to bring a certain person back and to take us, but God does not roll that way. El Shaddai, God Almighty – Yahweh – He is good and His mercy endures forever. The day will come when we will understand, but perhaps not now.

Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return to the Lord [Adonai], and He will have mercy upon him; and to our God [Yahweh], for He will abundantly pardon.

For My thoughts are not our thoughts; neither are your ways My ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts. [Is 55:8]

Perhaps you have not had anything happen to you in life that would bring you to that desperate, frustrated, and perhaps even momentarily angry point in time with your Creator, the true living God that you have loved and served.

Guard your healthy fear of the Lord. Respect that He is GOD, and there is no other. He is the true, living God and He always has a remnant, always. Ask forgiveness if your emotions caused you to be rude, disrespectful, or a complainer and grumbler. Turn away from bitterness; destroy any bitter root.

Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ [2Cor 10:5]

Sweet Surrender

Jesus IS merciful. When we repent with godly sorrow, He will forgive and not bring it back up to remembrance. [Micah 7:19] As people, we tend to ‘forgive’, but we do not forget. It is true that some things are hard to forget. We were given a memory for a reason.

I have heard people say they ‘forgive’ someone who did a great trespass against them, but if their name comes up, their countenance appears angry. Neither do their words align with how they look.

If one still has any animosity at all toward the person, the forgiveness is in their head but not their heart. Jesus told us to forgive seventy times seven, which means we will tire of counting long before we arrive 490 times. Either that, or we will lose track.

Animosity: it come from the Latin word ‘animus’, meaning spirit, mind, or high passion; a strong feeling of dislike or hatred: ill will or resentment tending toward active hostility: an antagonistic attitude – synonyms: bitterness, enmity, bad blood, hostility SOURCE: Merriam-Webster

Hatred in the heart is as a murderer in the heart. [1Jn 3:15] Let it go, and truly trust God to take care of things, in His way, and in His timing. That can be most difficult, especially when it comes to serious violations, I know. But our faith and our heart will be tried. This life is temporal. All will have to stand before a holy and just God.

We may learn ‘why’ further up the road, or we may not learn why until we meet Jesus in heaven. Will anything on earth seem important once we leave these earthen vessels, and leave the only ‘home’ (earth) that we have ever known?

Jesus can be trusted to do what is best for us in the long-run. That is where trust must stand. And remember, it only takes faith the size of a mustard seed to move mountains (of trouble). God is the God of the impossible.

These are not just ear-tickling, fluffy expressions to give false hope. They are the core, the foundation that establishes REAL hope faith through Jesus the Christ.

Now for the lyrics to the song.

Amazing Grace Fell Like Rain

by Mikhail Bennett, Rose Bennett, Christian Grace

I was carrying a thousand worries like stones inside my chest

Smiling through the pain of living, but my soul could find no rest

I had wandered through the silence, far from who I used to be

Then a quiet voice in darkness said, “My child, come back to Me.”

And when the night felt endless, I felt mercy hold my hand.

 

Amazing grace fell like rain on the driest parts of me

When my heart forgot its purpose, You still saw what I could be

Amazing grace gave me peace, when my world was torn apart

And the love I could not find here, You planted in my heart

 

There were battles no one noticed hidden deep behind my smile

I was losing faith in tomorrow, walking empty mile by mile

But You never stopped pursuing even when I turned away

Through the sorrow and confusion, You were lighting up my way

When I thought the road was over, heaven whispered through my pain

 

Amazing grace fell like rain on the driest parts of me

When my heart forgot its purpose, You still saw what I could be

Amazing grace gave me peace when my world was torn apart

And the love I could not find her, You planted in my heart

 

You were there inside the silence; You were there inside the storm

When I thought that I was broken, You were making something more

Not perfection, not religion, just a love that set me free

And the mercy I was chasing was already chasing me

 

Amazing grace lead me home when these tired eyes finally see

That the peace I searched forever was You walking next to me

Was You walking next to me

Amazing grace, You never stopped loving me

Never stopped loving me…

Never stopped loving me…

(Released July 2026) – AI-generated

True Confession – And That’s Okay

I shared some things I do not typically share (depression), but there are others who suffer silently too. Thanks in part to the prosperity gospel, there are those who believe that a Christian is not meant to be depressed (tell that to Job, Moses, Jacob’s son, Joseph, and David).

A Christian is not meant to have any sickness (Hezekiah, David, Timothy – three examples of sickness); not meant to be depressed (Job and David both suffered depression), not meant to live at poverty level (being poor is not a sin), not ever to question their faith or any do any critical thinking or ask any critical questions. (lies from Satan)

It is not realistic to think a true Christian will not suffer any of these things. Prosperity teachers (false doctrine) and wolves in sheep’s clothing teach that. The enemies of the cross plant their seeds of deception as well. But we serve the most incredible God. There are no adequate words to describe either Jesus or the Sovereign, Providential Yahweh (God).

For a couple of decades, I have tried to describe God and Jesus, but this writer has not been successful in it (smiles – I am in good company, I hear). The living God is holy, dependable, and always has a listening ear, unless one is stiff-necked and refuses to turn from their sin.

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Dark Night of the Soul

That being said, I recently went through what has been named for centuries as a “dark night of the soul”. It is surely is not the first time, but I pray it is the last. This dark night is a time when a war0weary soul hits a dark period, completely exhausted – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually – from life’s battles, which are at time daily.

The struggles deep within are confusing and painful, a time that one goes through very much alone (more often than not), feeling abandoned by a world void of understanding or compassion. It is a time that a mask might go on, one that convinces observers that everything is okay. We may share events or things that are happening with a trusted friend, but keep the heavy turmoil churning inside, strictly to ourselves so that we do not trip anyone else up, or shake up their faith. God forbid!

Pass the Test

It is important that people know God is good, and He definitely loves us, but we may still struggle with hopelessness and misunderstanding of the Lord’s ways, which is devastating to our spirit. We want to appear strong, but feel the weakest we have ever felt.

We do not want to be a hypocrite, but at the same time, we do not want to complain, or worse yet, we do not want to trip others up, and discourage them. So, we carry the burden alone, not knowing what to ay to our precious Lord.

People believe you are strong, when inside, you feel so weak. As a Christian, we do not want people to see us stressed, upset, angry, or even depressed. Few see it as the crisis it is, where the soul is experiencing a type of dismantling, a deep emotional pain, a disconnect from the world, from others, and – even from God.

We might feel crazy with the mixture of emotions and pretending to be stronger than we are, but we are not crazy… at least, we hope we are not. What it does mean is that we are going through a purging. Things that are not of God are being exposed and the dross is surfacing.

Growing pains are a reality. It is not a physical pain, but it is a very deep, harsh pain. Our faith is being tested. It is being tried more than it ever has been before. I have spoken in the past about Job, and Abraham, and Moses, and Joseph.

Faith Will Be Tested

I posted a scripture some time back that helps us to remember the testing of our faith. Just like a Samurai sword must be proven (tested) to see if it is worthy to be in the hands of a skilled warrior in a battle, so must our faith be proven (tested) to see if we love God first above all things, and having gone through many tests, and having done all – to stand.

He sent a man before them, even Joseph, who was sold for a servant: Whose feet they hurt with fetters: he was laid in iron: Until the time that his word (promise) came: the Word of the Lord (Adonai/Yahweh) tried (tested) him [Ps 105:17-19]

Many give up at this point, right before the victory comes to fruition. I know I almost did. I did not almost give up on Jesus, nor on God, but on any hope of glorifying Him, or doing something that will please Him, or the promises I believe to come to fruition, or even staying strong to the end.

Help me, Lord, in the times where I feel that I cannot take any more. I do ask why, why must I go through this? Is there no other way for me to learn what it is you want me to learn? Why won’t it end?? It seems never-ending. I know I am not being punished for something, but it sure feels like it.

I know I have an attitude sometimes (frustration, disappointed, betrayal); or a curse word slips out. I hate when my mouth shames me.

I am surrounded by those who cuss, but it’s not an excuse. I need to exercise self-control. I grew up with it, spoke it sometimes. Ahh Lord, help me to be what You want me to be. Help me to make it to the end, to put others first. Do Ido it even when they trespass against me?   

I love you, Lord. You are good. You have done much for me (and the tears appear endless. Perhaps save me from myself, Lord.

The pain is daily, unable to walk far without assistance. I grew up around violence, but I chose not to be violent...                                                                           Lord, I know others suffer more, but I cannot possibly compare myself to others, it’s too much. But like Paul, I do things I do not want to do, and do not do the things I should.

I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good. So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.

For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. [Rom 7:15-18] ESV

Fight the Good Fight

It is a dark night where it is hard to see anything clearly. A wondering of purpose, an aloneness, a sense that no one understands, a horribly lonely feeling. It is a type of inner breakdown, a deep searching of the soul – a painful purging.

When a person is in that dark night, they deal with thoughts and feelings of guilt, shame, fear, and yes, anger. It is not meant to be a time of destruction, but a time of new beginnings, new strength, new wisdom, new growth…no matter the age.      

A loving parent longs to help their child, if they even suspect their child is going through a dark night of the soul. But it is like the butterfly struggling to come out of the cocoon. If the butterfly is helped out, or if someone peels open the chrysalis early, the limbs can be torn or become deformed on the new butterfly.

When the butterfly breaks free, it has to hang upside down immediately. It is so their little heart can pump fluid into the wings so they will expand. If someone handles the butterfly as soon as it comes out, the could cause it to die because without hanging upside down, the wings will dry and harden, causing them to shrivel up. That would mean the butterfly will never fly. Instead, it will die.

When a person comes out of a dark night of the soul, they may feel slightly disoriented (like things are upside down), but it is for our own good. That is usually when God is quiet…and some may think He does not care. Others may think He is not real. Listen, please. God does care. He is real!    

I sent this to each of my children (now  grown adults, two in their 30s and one early 40s), and said to them:

I believe you can relate to this song. As your mother, I want you to know that I love you deeply, ever since the moment you came out of my womb and I first laid eyes upon you, and held you gently in my arms. You have become a fine person – each one of you are different, yet each of you are such a gift to me (an undeserved gift, but I am grateful)!

I made so many mistakes, but I did my best with no backup. It is too bad because I believed in God/Jesus all my life, but I did not have any solid relationship with Him. It is written that even the demons believe and tremble.

Yet know this. I am here to be your backup, if and when you ever need any. When I lost all of you in 1994 when I ended up in the hospital for a month after one night of abuse with your father, I did turn to Jesus, but I had the wrong motive. I did not turn to Him to repent of my sins. I still had no fear of the Lord, nor was I filled with godly sorrow for my sins. I turned to Jesus because I wanted to get my children back from an alcoholic who would neglect and abuse all of you.

Jesus is so patient, so good. He had to work on the inside of each of us, so He could cleanse us, and dress us in robes of righteousness. He put people in our path who helped us at that time. Jesus never forces Himself on us. He desires people come willingly and gladly. Incredibly good, kind Jesus!

May this song minister to each of you as it did for me. May it move you to thank Jesus for His great love, care, salvation, forgiveness, deliverance, everything. Even though I was not saved at the time, each one of you were dedicated to the Lord when you were just weeks old. It was not done in a church, but I did get on my knees, lift each of you in the air, thank God for you, and acknowledged that you were His. I must have seen it or heard of it, I know not but now that I know Jesus, I believe that He led that action. I give Him the glory alone.

The ‘names’ of the artists/musicians of this song are all fictitious characters, AI-generated characters. They are not real people. And the video that someone put together is completely AI-generated. Once created, it was posted on YouTube, on a YouTube channel. It likely got posted on TikTok, Facebook, Rumble, or whatever…

AI characters and AI videos annoy me. It is artificial indeed, and I strongly dislike AI films.

However, I do like the song. My prayer is that it ministers to you all, as it did me. Be much blessed, my child. I love you forever, I like you for always. As long as I’m living, my baby you will be. (heart)

The Lord taught me patience, although I still blow it sometimes; He really and truly is an ever-present help in trouble.

You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you because he trusted in you. Trust in the Lord forever: for in the Lord Jehovah [YHVH] is everlasting strength. [Is 26:4] KJV

 for His glory alone

Bonita                     dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com

His Grace Sees Us Thru Every Hardship

(NOTE*: Updated May 8, 2025 - BP) 

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just
and will forgive us our sins and
purify us from all unrighteousness. [1Jn 1:9]

GRACE - amazing grace of our wise Creator

It would be a real shame to take it for granted...

I posted an article twelve (12) years ago that contained both truth and deception. It was an oversight. My heart ached when I saw it four days ago. It was during a time that I did not realize I was still serving out the consequences of a sin from  29 years earlier, when I rebelled (not realizing that is what I was doing), and chose idolatry - chose a man over Jesus.

What were the consequences? I will explain more fully in another article, but for now, let me say this. Take a look at King David. Did he not go through a season of consequences after sinning? He did - yet we think "that was different; I'm not him"... Our confidence rises, especially if we did not do what David did. There was ONE area -- ONE area that deception had to serve out its time -- all because of a choice I made.

Is that why I did not fully "see" when I allowed the prosperity gospel teaching on the radio (although the prosperity part was not taught or mentioned). Is that why apostles and prophets were mentioned in the "To the Weary" article?

I do have an article prepared, but it's needs more organizing, editing and prayer - particularly the latter. Prayer. I just couldn't get to it. This article has been getting down later at night when everyone is asleep, and no one texts or calls, or knocks on the door. No strange aches or pains or oddities happening in my body...

-- for this I give God the glory...

He makes the storm a CALM, so that the waves thereof are still. [Ps 107:29]

When a post is popular, the increase in traffic to it is recorded by ‘Blogger’ or ‘Blogspot’ (this website, owned by Google). The article I speak of is called, To The Weary, posted July 14, 2012.

An address to it was quickly written a day or two after I noticed it on my blog [four days ago]; however, my plan was to follow that up with an important, more in-depth article. The distractions and hindrances that I have had to confront ever since I began writing an explanation AND correction have been unbelievable – surreal.

The opposing forces were so recognizable that I realized it was spiritual, yet even so, it got to the point where I thought I had lost my sanity. I am one person and this last battle has been long, with mere days here and there as reprieve. Thank God for my beloved friends and brethren that literally “held up my spiritual arms”, and allowed the Lord to fight the battle.

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A fiery dart was aimed and hit my Achille's heel [direct hit in the weak areas]. The enemy was hitting all my areas of sensitivity (aka weak spots), and he was using my treasured family members to bring me to my wit’s end. Pain in the body also increased. 

It seemed like one thing would be addressed, leave, and something else would pop up. For example, I awoke one morning to what felt like a broken wrist. The pain was surreal.

So sudden and so strong was the pain that I even went to a walk-in clinic, who sent me elsewhere for an X-ray. Naturally, this happened on a Saturday, so the walk-in clinic closed early (before the X-ray results were back).

NOT my X-ray - 
this is an example only

Yet even come Monday morning, no word from the doctor. I had wrapped the wrist in a tensor bandage (my son and daughter took turns wrapping it). To cut to the quick, it took a week of calling around, asking if I could find out if it was a sprain, a hairline fracture, or what, because something was wrong.

Finally, on the seventh or eighth day after the X-ray, the pharmacist got a hold of the doctor and I received a doctor’s phone call, who told me it was osteoarthritis. No warning signs, just sudden pain like a broken bone? I asked.

Apparently yes, it happens sometimes; mine is severe. I could barely believe it, but these are the kind of “hindrances” and distractions I speak of. Ever since I prayed about healing, I would constantly run into articles, scriptures, videos, etc. about healing. I believe Jesus has been showing me so that I would not doubt or walk in unbelief, because the reality is that not everyone receives healing.

We all know that. None of us can explain why. Yes, children of light understand about faith and unbelief, but nothing irks me more than people who look at those who are suffering and say, "you just have to have enough faith".

Tell that to a newborn, or a seven-year old child with a terminal illness. We do NOT have all the answers, nor all the explanations. The prosperity preachers are notorious for talking about "faith". I have heard some pound it home about faith, then obviously they have done some reading, and will backtrack - suddenly admitting not everyone is healed...but (and smooth, people-pleasing talk follows). 

Some have removed videos that reveal their double-speak, but suffice it to say, God has heard them. Jesus is working with them -- but we must call out wolves. Trouble is, many sheep love wolves because they cannot see past the fake "sheep clothing". I will leave it there for now.

Yes, we have to run things by the Lord. He will let us know. I believe that. He revealed Himself to Stephen, so that the saint knew he was going to die. He saw Jesus/Yeshua by the side of the Father's throne.

Peter knew he would be crucified; Paul knew he would not see certain people again because his time had come. God will lead us by His Spirit. That being said, I personally believe the Lord has been showing me that my healing is coming (and NOT just mine). 

Ever hear of miracles? Grace? Mercy?

God of wonders -- wonder of God

Hallelujah! He is moving across this world...He IS moving! Yes, great trouble is coming, but let God be God. Sovereignty - providence - benevolence.

I know I heard that I have need of patience, but the promise will come. [I did acknowledge the Lord, knowing He was right...then (without thinking, like a doofus...I asked, "how long do I have to wait, Lord?")

Ack... sigh...yes, I have need of patience...

However, there are also those who are struggling with some unbelief that are around me, but they "hope for the best" without 'saying what they think'. They want to believe. May God help us all!

It is okay because such are the skirmishes and battles one faces in spiritual warfare. Satan has made a mess by entangling the truth of God's Word with false doctrines. I trust the Lord - I pray for strength to endure until the appointed time. Just as those who have gone before me have had to wait...they stood strong even when everything appeared as the exact opposite.

The prosperity gospel is one false doctrine that Satan used and USES to mess up the healing of God's people. All these things have been thrown against me by the enemy. He has used my loved ones, as well as strangers.

WHO will hold His own [people] steady? WHO gives His own [people] strength? 

Jesus (Yeshua) -- How? How does Messiah do it when we are flesh and He is not [flesh] at this time in history? Well, in case some forgot (and for others)  who do not yet know, Jesus came in the flesh. 

And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld His [Jesus/Yeshua] glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father), full of grace and truth. [Jn 1:14]

He DID come in the flesh when He had His ministry for three years upon the earth, and He comes in the flesh when we believe and receive Him by faith, when we are born-again. He instructs us to abide in Him as He abides in us. 

I typically use the imagery of grapes clinging to a healthy, nurturing  vine. Jesus is the Vine, we are the grapes. We cling to Him for He said: 

I AM the way, the truth, and the LIFE; no on come to the Father but by [through] Me. [Jn 14:6]  (emphasis mine)

Jesus promised the disciples that He would ask the Father to send a Helper (after Jesus was resurrected from the dead and then ascended into heaven to sit on the right-hand side of the Father). The "Helper/Comforter" is the Holy Spirit. He will teach and guide us into all truth, and tell us what He hears, and what is yet to come. [Jn16:13]

Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit, said the Lord of hosts. [Zech 4:6]

When I began looking up phone numbers for counsellors, it was not easy. There seemed to be few who are Christian. Was there not any ‘free counseling’? In days gone by, a pastor might take time out of his schedule to help a hurting, confused sheep, but where are they now?

Even those who work on a sliding scale begin at a rather high percentage per hour. Yes, I know …”the labourer is worthy of his wage.” [1Tim 5:18] “[…] …worthy of his hire.” [Lk 10:7] So it is written, so it is true.

Ah Lord –  looks like You are stuck with me. Since I now need a walker and a cane, I have not been attending a church physically. I listen to sermons and services for shut-ins online, and I am not the only one. It is difficult for me to sit, stand, or walk for long periods of time.

 I can only go by the guidance of the Lord, not by the opinions of people. We all have an opinion, and the funny thing is how often we change our opinions (self included). It all depends on the information we have on hand, and what develops.

Counselors. Yet with all the variances and diverse beliefs, especially ones that stray from the true gospel, how do I find a counselor of like mind? I searched and tried – dead end. Finances and availability…

If any were available but who had different beliefs, and I refused to go as a result, would I be a hypocrite? Did I not just repent from posting and endorsing a false doctrine, in fact, a doctrine that led me astray when I put it into practice a long time ago; one that taught me a hard lesson?

I would be a hypocrite if I said I repented but then took up counseling with someone who represented a church that taught false doctrines, or who practiced those teachings themselves. 

The problem with false doctrines is that they do contain truth, which confuses people, especially new believers or people who do not know their bibles or walk close to God. But they turn people away from the true Christ and the true gospel.

It was said once: “False teaching is like food laced with poison. It is 98% good food and 2% poison, and it is the 2% that kills.” Back in the late 90s, someone brought over an 8-track (must have taken that old thing out of the back of the Flintstone-car they drove [dinosaur days] lol). 

It was a tape with Kent Hovind, a young Earth creationist. It is the only thing I remember from the video. I was not saved yet, and it was the only tape I saw. That was just shy of thirty (30) years ago.

I have an article written about the prosperity gospel, and what I posted left some things flapping in the wind. For example, the friend (acquaintance) that drove me back over the border into Canada is a woman I liked very much. She has a prophetic gifting, but I did not hear any of her prophetic words.

I never called her a prophetess but she has advertised (in posters) herself with that title, and her husband as an apostle. I do not remember her discussing it with me, but I will say that I remember Tish (Latshia) as a kind, warm-hearted person who did not pull any punches.

Being a straight-shooter myself, I respected that quality in her personality. How deep she was or is into the prosperity gospel I do not know. She believed in decreeing and declaring things, that is for sure. Seed-faith and the rest, I do not know. As stated, we were more acquaintances than friends. Our commonality was our love for Jesus the Christ.

But I do thank the Lord for bringing her across my path because she did help me by driving me over the US/Canada border when I was returning to Canada September 17, 2014. Her offer to drive me was an exponential help. 

It was wonderful the way I was given the “go-ahead” at the border when I was so concerned. Deep within the Lord had placed a quiet word that I would make it back over – not to fear. I fought fear – it had been almost seven years I was in the US.

“Years?” the border patrol guard laughed as he repeated my answer to his question. “How long were you in the States, ma’m? Do you have anything to declare?” I answered, “Years…likely everything I have has to be declared as bought in the States.”

Peace Bridge - US/Canada border

When he realized I was serious, he laughed again. (NOT the reaction I was expecting.) We had prayed before we got in the car. The Lord must have assigned an angel to be at the border crossing.

I not only got across the border; I was waved through like I was royalty. What a high! On the other hand, Tish had a hard time getting back over because she brought her little boy (he was young, maybe four or five), but his ID [identification] was in a little folder and it had dropped somewhere.

What a horrific feeling! Tish was beside herself trying to find it, and of course, the border patrol likely had their doubts. But praise God, eventually she was able to find it and return home. The trip took me much longer than expected (three and a half days longer). When I arrived in BC, I had $21 to my name.

It cost $20 exactly to get me to a homeless shelter, where I ended up staying for four months, sick the whole time with pneumonia. Well, at least I could say that I arrived with cash in my pocket – even if it was only $1.00.

The “up side” is that I had exactly what I needed to arrive at my destination from the States. Once I arrived, I had food and shelter and a dollar. I began the process of renewing my driver’s license, and other documentation that I needed to begin life again in my home country.

The shelter kept cell phones in lockup, but gave them to people when they went outside the shelter. I did not go out much, barely at all, since I was sick. Twice I ended up in the hospital. When I did go out, it was to the Internet Café to look up housing.

BC was so expensive and the available housing was minimal. I managed to speak with Tish a couple of times, but weeks and months passed. Eventually, as acquaintances, we lost touch. We have not heard from each other for over a decade now.

I will always be grateful to Latshia (Tish) for her kind act of taking me over the border. I also slept on her couch for a few hours (not sure exactly how long) – I was exhausted because I barely slept in 36 hours. She fed me a spaghetti dinner before taking me to the bus depot to begin the long hike across Canada (a 6-day journey from Niagara Falls to Kelowna, BC).

I accidentally purchased a ticket for a Greyhound Courier Express bus, meaning they doubled as couriers for mail and parcel delivery, which meant stopping in nearly every little town along the way, rural areas {called a postbus).

I did not know, but I reckon it is because before I purchased the ticket, I had asked if they had any “specials” for going across Canada. I was going from Atlanta, Georgia to Buffalo, New York. My friend took me from Buffalo NY, US/Canada border crossing from Niagara Falls [Peace Bridge]. Hallelujah, I made it back safely!

May the Lord bless and keep the Smith family, guiding them into all truth, for their sake, but for the glory of Jesus.

Whether it was the little contact from me during my stay in the shelter, or whether we were only meant to cross paths for a short time, I will not know until heaven.  I will always remember Tish as a fine person, with a loving husband and father, and children – a beautiful family – I am ever grateful to both of them, a team for sure.

They opened up their home to me, a Christian, yet still, practically a stranger, and even so…they truly blessed me with a warm and sincere welcome. Very nice people…Lord bless the entire family, in the name above all names.

A Message

March 22, 2025

Wait upon Me and I answer. You have need of patience. I spoke to you, and humbly you received it. Now you sense within, the time has come. It is the season. Listen carefully as I lead. The corruption goes deep.

Many innocent ones are ensnared if they look away momentarily, for the enemies of the cross are moving swiftly these days. You are witnessing the wisdom of the false ones whose first concern are their riches.

They concern themselves with what people are saying about them, instead of coming to Me with their concerns. They love the admiration of the people who reward them with loyalty, flattery and plenty of gifts, both monetary and material gain.

Trust Me in all that is coming.

Trust Me with it all. Yes, I AM protecting all of you. It is your season. Your time to blossom is nearly here. Health and wealth are not something to fear. However, be wise. These things are not to be idolized, and sadly, [these things] truthfully, are not for all.

 Remember this world is not your home. Stay instant in prayer. Forgive friends All the things that concern you will be addressed. Vengeance is Mine. Pray for mercy for those who come against (who came and come against), and I will show mercy. Seventy times seven keeps your heart in a pure place.

There was no intention to post this, but I am led to. This prophetic message comes from "To the Weary" - July 17, 2013

How heavy is your heart, My child, for the battle has been hard and long. Hold fast to Me, for awhile longer and you shall see the victory. The time of sealing, the test of endurance belongs to the remnant who are Mine and shall endure to the end, coming through victoriously, having been well-trained by previous tests and tribulations, having been purged and purified, in the fires and through the waters. 

Yea, hold fast to Me, for I AM your refuge and your strong tower.  Yea, the cross is heavy when it is being carried, and excruciatingly hard to the flesh to stay upon, dying to self and all that is in the world.

Yet only after death can My resurrection power go forth to raise you up to a place where the enemy cannot touch you. Healing and restoration are in My hand. Look up, look up for your redemption draws nigh. 

Chaos and destruction are coming upon mankind and the world, yet I AM the one who shall create the new when all is said and done. 

Keep on your armor; pray without ceasing, abide in Me and do that which I ask of you to do. (*Note* 0bedience is the word that came to mind as I wrote this, and keeping a repentant heart. BP

Great blessing is about to fall upon My obedient children; but great judgment also is falling upon all nations and all peoples of the earth. Yes, and the wrath of the devil, the prince of this world is coming, but he has nothing on Me.                                    

His wrath has been loosed for a time, yea, but he knows that his time is short. [Rev 12:12] Look to Me and abide, for I AM your strength, your wisdom, your discernment, your all in all.  

My peace I give you, not as the world gives, but the peace I give passes all understanding. [Phil 4:7] Let not your heart be troubled [Jn 14:1]; neither be afraid.

[End Message] To The Weary,

for His glory alone

Bonita                          dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com