Patience is Learned - One of the Hardest Lessons

It has been the craziest, busiest time I ever remember having, and I have had busy times before, as we all have and do.

Those who have faithfully stopped by the site to see if anything new is posted...thank you for your patience! Speaking for myself, I can confidently state that patience is learned, but it is one of the hardest lessons.

Waiting on the Lord will require faith and that faith will be tried to the max! We have plenty of examples in the Bible (God's holy Word) of God's people who had to wait for their promises or wait for God to move or intervene.  Some were successful in their wait, such as Job, Abraham, Joseph (Jacob's son), Hannah, Elizabeth and many other examples. Some were not successful, such as Saul, who was moved by fear and doubt when the circumstances tempted him to believe God was not going to keep his promise (through Samuel, the prophet). [1Sam 13:1-15]

May God help us all to be as the former and not as the latter.

I ask readers to please allow 3-4 more days for the next post. May the Lord help me to keep to that, and may He be glorified through it all.

Thanking any and all readers in advance for your understanding, but mostly...your patience!

for His glory,

Bonita                     dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com

When the World Comes Crashing Down

Understanding the Wait

Up until A Time to be Silent was posted Tuesday the 12^th of June (2018) in the beginning of a new day, there had been silence from me. No writing went forth whatsoever. It was over five weeks ago (about June 6^th) that it had been placed upon my heart to begin to write again. 

When I began this article, I had put “nearly two days ago”; then, “nearly a week ago”; then, I had to change it again to “nearly three weeks ago”; “nearly five weeks”…well, you get the idea. The days speedily ticked by. It is now six weeks ago.

This article may start off slow, but it will build momentum. Please bear with me, and may the Lord be glorified through it all.

Over the past weeks (in June), off and on throughout the day and night, I earnestly prayed about many things and waited upon the Lord. At great lengths, it seemed I waited and waited…and waited still more. I have often said that our Sovereign Creator, our Redeemer and King, is silent sometimes. He has every right to be. He is God after all. 

The Lord’s silence is not punishment or chastisement, as some would teach or mislead others to believe. Rather, it is part of God’s character, which is often demonstrated throughout the Bible. After receiving two prophetic dreams from God, Joseph spent 13 years in Egypt with no word from God.

During those long and difficult seasons of his life where he had to wait, the closest Joseph came to hearing from God was when he received the interpretation of two individual dreams from two fellow prisoners. They were but two of the top officials that served Pharaoh; one being his personal cupbearer, the chief of the butlers, and the other being the chief of the bakers. 

[Gen 40:5-8]

Joseph knew the gift of interpretation that he had been given came from the Lord and as a result, he gave the glory to God alone.

[…] And Joseph said unto them, Do not interpretations belong to God? Tell me them, I pray you. (Joseph asked the men to tell him their dreams.) [vs 8]

Not once is it written that God spoke to Joseph during those years. Imagine. After Potiphar’s wife, the temptress, falsely accused him, Joseph was cast into an Egyptian dungeon and had an iron collar put around his neck, and shackles that were so tight they hurt his feet. [Gen 40:15; Ps 105:17-19] How long he was kept in these we do not know, but we do know that he ended up having favour in the eyes of the keeper of the prison. [Gen 39:21]

So much so that Joseph was appointed to serve the cupbearer and the baker whilst they were in prison. Obviously at that point, Joseph was no longer fettered or bound in chains. It was considered an honour and privilege to serve the officials of the king (Pharaoh) of the land, if and when they were imprisoned.

Royal officers were kept in a place where only the king’s (Pharaoh’s) prisoners were kept, that being in the house of the captain of the guards. It is also the part of the prison where Joseph was kept. [Gen 39:20, 21]

Did Joseph hear anything from the Lord God during those years, or did he have more prophetic dreams? The understanding and interpretation of the individual dreams of the cupbearer and baker were placed within Joseph’s spirit by the Lord.

Aside from that and according to the biblical records, the answer is no. God remained silent during those years of Joseph’s imprisonment. Was God involved? We know that He was because all that Joseph set his hand to prospered, and he had favour in the eyes of Potiphar, his master, and the keeper of the prison. [Gen 39:2, 5-6]

What about Abraham as he waited for the son of promise? We see where God spoke to him initially when He first made the covenant with Abraham [Gen 12:4-5], but then ten years of silence passed. [Gen 16:3] After Ishmael was born, the Lord appeared to Abraham to renew His covenant. Thirteen years of silence would then pass before the Lord spoke again, saying that at the same time the following year, Sarah would give birth to their son. [Gen 17:1]

How about when Jesus the Messiah was in the desert wilderness being tempted by Satan? There is no record of the Father speaking to Him or any angel ministering to Christ during those forty days of fasting and temptation. [Mat 4:1-11; Lk 4:1-13] There are plenty of examples of God’s silent times with His people, including His only begotten Son, Jesus/Yeshua.

If you are experiencing a season of silence with the Lord God, know that you are in good company. Many, including Jesus, experienced it. Even upon the cross, in what was the most desperate, painful and brutal time of Jesus’ life, God was silent.

God will speak through His Word, by His Spirit, and in any other way or through whomsoever He chooses. Wait on Him.

Unto You will I cry, O Lord my rock; be not silent to me; lest, if you be silent to me, I become like them that go down into the pit. Hear the voice of my supplications, when I cry unto You, when I lift up my hands toward Your holy oracle. [Ps 28:1, 2]

Keep not You silence, O God: hold not Your peace and be not still, O God. 

[Ps 83:1]

So that they (mighty men) cause the cry of the poor to come unto Him, and He hears the cry of the afflicted. He gives quietness (silence), who then can make trouble? And when He hides His face, who then can behold Him? whether it be done against a nation, or against a man only; [Job 34:28, 29]

One thing we all must learn as disciples of Jesus. God is silent at times. Throughout His written word we can find numerous examples. Yes, sometimes it was due to sin, and at times a part of His longsuffering (patience with sinful people). But there are times were it is to test the heart to see what is in it. Other times, His silence is unexplained in scripture.

How often have we heard someone say, “I don’t want to talk about it right now”, or “I will say (speak) no more on this matter”, or “I can’t answer that right now”? How often have we asked a question of another, only to be met with their silence?

Silence happens, and it is not necessarily a negative thing. It is written in book of Ecclesiastes: […] there is a time to keep silence, and a time to speak. 

[Ecc 3:7]

If we can accept the fact that there are indeed times of silence, both with man and with God, we will learn to embrace (accept) it, and patiently wait the time out. This is something that I must remind myself of as well, especially in the times where I need answers quickly.

Here is my thought, and yes, it is a thought, but also part of my understanding. It has seemed to me that in the times of God silence, He has been molding me into Christ’s image. It is often a time of growing and learning. It is a time of refining as well.

Am I always “okay” with God’s silence? I wish I could say an emphatic ‘yes’, but I cannot. My flesh can get in the way and be obstinate, but again, like all of God’s people, I too continue to progress in my walk, even if slowly or awkwardly at times. God is most patient.

Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me. [Jn 14:1] (Jesus’ words)

Now It Begins

What time I am afraid, I will trust in You. [Ps 56:3]

Now I come to the hard and more difficult part of this piece of work. I hesitated in sharing the following, and even struggled with how to present it, but if in any way the telling of it can help another, then may it be so and may Jesus be glorified.

The delay in the writing of this article began as one thing after another happened, much like a domino effect. For now, I will back up to April, when the flu had come back upon me for a second round. The first bout of the flu struck several of us in two neighbouring towns back in late February (2018), lasting between three to six weeks.

For five weeks I suffered relentless fatigue and breathing problems that became worse as each week passed. It was so laborious by the third week that I finally went to the doctor, only to have my suspicion confirmed. Pneumonia had developed.

Another course of antibiotics was prescribed (the first round was for the flu itself), along with an inhaler. The latter produced such intense coughing episodes in me that when it happened, the extreme pressure caused temporary urinary incontinence. Troubling, indeed!

After a week of putting up with the embarrassing consequences, I discontinued using the inhaler. In less than two weeks, the violent coughing stopped and has not returned, thus also ending the incontinence. However, with this particular strain of flu, the slightest exertion also made breathing a strenuous and laborious experience.

It seemed to affect everyone this way, no matter what the age group was. Yet, I had experienced that extreme in breathing once before several years ago (2013), when I developed pneumonia when living in Georgia, USA.

Back then, I could not walk six feet from the kitchen sink to the fridge without stopping to catch my breath. I suddenly realized what some old people must feel like. The same was happening again. It was all so humbling, so frightening. Each occurrence of pneumonia has made me more susceptible to it.

I had thoughts that perhaps my purpose was served. Being unwell for a couple of months with the flu, pneumonia and then a relapse of flu, there were times that I thought my time on earth was up. The last episode lasted nearly two full months, from April to mid-June. When I first returned to Canada in 2014, a case of pneumonia lasted four months. In the third month, I was coughing up blood and thought then also that I was going to die.

However, in June, breathing had finally stabilized, and the fatigue that had me sleeping anywhere from 16-18 hours a day (catching sleep only a few hours at a time) was dissipating noticeably. It is not for sympathy that I write these things, but rather to reveal that I was already in a weakened state physically.

Be that as it may, a sense of well-being finally came upon me. I was beginning to regain strength. Hope that I would survive shone brighter. I was able to post another long-awaited article. But just when I was almost out of the woods health-wise, my financial situation took an unexpected, sudden nosedive. I had helped someone very close to me out financially.

No sooner had I done so then unexpected expenses cropped up. How could this be? Everything was fine. What happened? I did not think that going without food would be an issue since I have disciplined my body to fast. Even still, there is a difference when one plans to go without food, such as with fasting, and when one must go without because there are no funds or means. Even my vehicle has sat…on empty.

When the World Comes Crashing Down

Then, five weeks ago, almost immediately after being swamped with the financial hardship, I received news that turned my life upside down. A very tragic and serious occurrence had taken place involving an immediate family member.

It had a ripple effect, devastating two families and the close friends and acquaintances of both. One innocent moment can change history and lives. I cannot go into details at this time, but suffice it to say, it crushed me to a degree beyond imagination – and not only me, but everyone close to those involved in the tragedy. A sense of absolute helplessness and grief enveloped me.

It seemed I was hit from every angle, and pain struck the very core of my being, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. Why? Was the tragic event not enough that I must also get hit on every side? My flesh cried out in its misery. It was also at that very time that my health took a turn for the worse again, not with my lungs, but with other parts of my body. Pain…

The writing of this article was the furthest thing from my mind. When the shock wore off several days after the initial news was received, the numbness gave way to overwhelming and paralyzing bewilderment, grief, sorrow, confusion, frustration, and even anger. Why was all this happening? Then, out of nowhere, unfounded lies, accusations and verbal attacks began.

Then said I, Woe is me! for I am undone; because I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of the hosts. [Is 6:5]

There were days when I avoided everyone, ignoring incoming calls and texts, avoiding the computer, refusing to go out if I did not have to. I needed the time with the Lord. Yet when I went to pray, I didn’t know what to say. All I could do was travail and weep. What a violent storm – winds howling, beating against me; the brutal waves of the storm were ruthless, relentless, without mercy!

When I did have to go out, I had snapped at strangers; emotions were unstable. Immediately ashamed, remembering that I am a Christian, I would apologize, but why was I acting out like that? One day it seemed as though I had a handle on things, and the next day I would nearly lose control, fiercely fighting the threat of a burst of tears even in public places. It seemed that in anything I said or did, I was messing up. It was an emotional rollercoaster and I wanted off, but it seemed there was no end in sight.

And the rain descended, and the floods (torrents) came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock. 

[Mat 7:25]

Various scriptures and remnants of sermons flashed through my mind at rapid speed. Sometimes it seemed condemning; other times, encouraging. I held my head to still my thoughts, as I sobbed heavily.

Had I lost my mind? I began to question my sanity. Do crazy people know they are crazy? I had wondered. Fear raised its ugly head; unbelief taunted me like Goliath, mocking my faith and questioning God’s love for me and the others affected by the tragedy.

My flesh and spirit warred. I did not want to dishonor God or grieve the Holy Spirit. Concentration would not stay with me as I read the scriptures, and I would close the Bible in frustration. Yet, needing strength from the Lord, I would reopen the book, only to again shut it in exasperation. A path was being worn as the floors were paced.

How did everything unravel? What was I doing wrong? A thousand questions raced through my mind. Then, I would rebuke myself, “It’s not all about you!” I heard the words in my spirit. Was that my voice, the voice of the adversary, or the voice of my Lord? Everything was so blurred.

Yes, the words of Christians in past times came at me, “There must be some kind of sin you’re hiding. Is there something you forgot to confess?” At random times, I would find myself repenting of every thought, every word, everything I could think of whether I was guilty of it or not, or even if the thing had been forgiven long ago in a distant time of repentance. Oftentimes, I held my head tightly, as if that would stop insanity in its tracks.

A friend had said to focus on Jesus. I knew that. I was trying, but the thoughts were too random, too scattered, too fast, too furious, too bizarre and too jumbled. Is that the mind and the suffering of someone who is bi-polar? I could not allow myself to be divided, lest I fall! Lord God, have mercy.

It knew that I knew that I knew that it was not just about me. I was very well aware of the pain, grief, sorrow and loss that others were suffering as a result of what happened also. What was I doing or what had I done, were questions hastily asked of the Lord. Then, guilt and a sincere fear of the Lord consumed me…days passed, a couple of weeks passed.

Where had the time gone? It only seemed like only yesterday all was well. And it seemed as only yesterday that the onslaught occurred. Prayers had gone up to the Lord, but God seemed silent. Indeed, it was a comfort knowing that brethren were praying for everyone involved in the situation, and praying for me. Although people had told me they were praying, I also somehow sensed it.

Certain portions of different Psalms became my voice as I used them in my brokenness, praying to my heavenly Father.

Give ear to my prayer, O God; and hide not Yourself from my supplication. Attend unto me, and hear me: I mourn in my complaint, and make a noise; Because of the voice of the enemy, because of the oppression of the wicked: for they cast iniquity upon me, and in wrath they hate me.

My heart is sore pained within me: and the terrors of death are fallen upon me. Fearfulness and trembling are come upon me, and horror has overwhelmed me. [Ps 55:1-5]

  How long will You forget me, O LORD? forever? how long will You hide Your face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily? how long shall my enemy be exalted over me?

Consider and hear me, O LORD my God: lighten my eyes, least I sleep the sleep of death; Least my enemy say, I have prevailed against him; and those that trouble me rejoice when I am moved.  [Ps 13:1-4]

A Timely Reminder

Sometimes when we think God is silent, He is actually speaking to us in unexpected ways. It may be that God speaks through nature or through an off-hand, seemingly unrelated remark from a stranger, friend or relative (any age).

You may see a sign, or you may “stumble” across something written that speaks right into your situation. God leads us many times when we are not even aware. I was leafing through some old notebooks, writings I had done from the past.

I came across a remnant of an article that simply had “2013” written on it, but for some reason I stopped and read it. I would say the “reason” was the prodding of the Holy Spirit. Below is the message.

I know it is hard; I know the frailty of flesh. I understand how flesh wars against (resists) the spirit. Yea, but I see the motives and intentions of even the most awkward child. Trust Me. Yea, when you are willing and lay it down, do you see how I open your eyes now to reveal to you that I AM with you? I did not leave or forsake you.

I am walking with you through the fire. If you cannot see because of the flames of the fire, then at least be aware that you are not consumed. You are still here. Allow My peace that passes all understanding to assure you of My presence.

In focusing on Me, instead of the fire, instead of the circumstances and those that threw you into the fire, then you can rest, knowing that I AM indeed walking with you through this fiery time.

As you trust in Me, holding fast to your faith, I shall bring you through. Despise not this furnace of affliction, for again I say to you, this is My will and My great love for you, and I shall bring you through. Though others may think they know the end of a matter, fear not, for they know not My mind, nor can they counsel Me.

Yea, let him who is without sin cast the first stone. Now you go deeper, pressing in closer to Me, along the narrow path, learning further obedience by the things you suffer, even unto death. Those whose intentions are pure will surrender to My hand which does the shaking, and they shall endure.

Though He were a Son, yet learned He obedience by the things which He suffered. [Heb 4:8]

That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perishes, though it be tried by fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ. [1 Pet1:7]

I have seen the intentions and motives of your heart: fear not. I love the awkward foal as much as the strong horse.

(End of the fragment of the original writing)

Utterly Broken, Completely Shattered!

Things kept coming against me, until finally, with great humility and in desperate surrender, I crumbled before the Lord on my knees, bowed down, literally pressing my face to the floor. With everything within me, I poured my heart out to him. Travailing, searching for understanding, completely shattered, broken.

Sow for yourselves righteousness; reap in mercy; break up your fallow ground: for it is time to seek the LORD, till He come and rain righteousness upon you. [Hos 10:12]

I did seek the Lord, but with many questions. I asked Him why He allowed me to live in the womb. Why He had saved my life more than once? I despised having been born. How many times must I go through fiery trials? Why does every trial seem worse, harder than the last one?

How come every time I think it is a dark night of the soul, and it is done for good once it passes, another dark time comes laughing at me? Why is it when I think the worst testing is done, another test comes along that is even harder?

Does every test have to be a hardcore, lengthy exam? Can I never just have a pop quiz, or a multiple choice test? How come whenever I think I have finally gone through the fire that is seven times hotter, I find out that I haven’t even come close? Does it ever end?

(Note* - Hours later, the Holy Spirit shone forth, leading me through the Holy Scriptures.)

I had not realized that part of my groaning, in those moments that the words poured forth from my heart, I had actually parroted or echoed the very words of Job. I lacked understanding; I hungered for comprehension!

Every sin I ever committed seemed to come before me. The reality, the ugliness and the remembrance of them broke me even more. Whatever I was doing wrong, IF that was the reason, I wanted to bring it all up, once and for all…and surrender in humility, confessing in genuine repentance before my God. O sweet Jesus, my Yeshua!

Finally, I could think of no more wrongs that had been left unspoken. I had prayed for all secret faults and hidden motives, any hidden sins to be brought to the surface, praying for eyes to see and the strength to acknowledge and confess. No, all that happened and was happening had nothing to do with unconfessed sin. The Holy Spirit is faithful to speak truth and guide us in all things.

The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and contrite heart, O God, You do not despise. [Ps 51:17]

I prayed for everyone affected by what happened, including those directly involved. I prayed for brethren, both locally and those scattered around the globe, those I knew and those that I do not know in the flesh.

There was prayer for friends and others who are going through their own hard times, and asked for protection and blessings upon those that were doing alright at the moment. I prayed for family; prayers for neighbours, community, town, country(ies). I prayed until I could think of no more to pray about. Then I asked forgiveness.

God is aware of our sufferings; He has not abandoned or forsaken us. He is aware of what we are going through. He cares and is involved, even behind the scenes.

“Forgive me, Lord Jesus…for doubting your love. I just don’t understand what’s happening or where I stand in it all, but I am here, when you chose to instruct me and let me know what you desire of me, Lord.

Forgive my hasty words, I pray. Forgive my scattered thoughts, and intense emotions and feelings. All that I am, and all that I have, and all that I love…is yours. Have your way Lord; only let me know your will so that I remain in it.

When people lie, or accuse, or betray me, help me, through Your holy Spirit.

Hold it not against them.I know that we all mess up. I'm aware of all the times I've blown it. Help me to forgive them from my heart and not just in my mind because even my flesh can betray me. I know Lord, I know that…

Thank You for all you have done, all You are doing and all that You will do. Strengthen me to be all that You intended me to be, so that Jesus is glorified, no matter what. Thank You for hearing this simple and awkward prayer. In the name above all names, Your Son Jesus…amen”

The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord, and He delights in his way. Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; for the Lord upholds him with his hand. [Ps 37:23, 24]

A sincere desire came upon me to offer up thanksgiving and praise to a very patient Creator and good Father. That is the Lord’s leading. As we grow and mature in Christ Jesus, we are taught and learn through the Word of God and the Holy Spirit what we are to do in times of great anguish and tribulation.

Such actions can defy logic, and the flesh will try to excuse itself from doing so, but we must press on to do the right thing. One of the things that was greatly troubling me was fear. As much as I do not like to admit it, fear was showing its frightening face, trying with great earnest to dispel the light with its foreboding dark presence.

God’s love is never-ending. It was in the knowing that He loved me that fear was not able to consume me, but that evil spirit was incessant. Was I not perfected in love, God’s perfect love? Why was the battle against fear so intense in this dark hour?

Well, it was later on that I came across another snippet from an article. When it was written, I do not know. There was no date on the part I randomly came across. Although I read it well after my time with the Lord that I speak of here, it fits here. It is a prophetic word from the Lord. As it is written in the Bible, the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy. [Rev 19:10]

Below is the word I was led to.

Remember this well – it is worth repeating. [I have] not given you a spirit of fear, but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. [2Tim 1:7] Focus on Me. Look to Me, for I gather you in My arms, My precious child. Though darkness looms all around, I AM the light that dispels it.

The lessons and the tests are most intense, yet they are necessary to strengthen you, for great evil approaches and shall soon manifest in grand measure. You see the signs. You know My signature. (You know My Word, for it is written.) I want you prepared and strong.

This is why I tell you to cast off all fear, doubt and unbelief. I do not do My work around fear and unbelief. These enemies are not from Me, nor are they sent by Me. Do not allow these things to cause you to sin, but rather lift up your shield of faith.

Sharpen your two-edged sword and use it to come against the enemies of the cross and the enemies of Christ, who are also your enemies, for you are My child. My Son’s blood conquers all. Stick to the basics; keep upon the ancient path and follow My commandments.

The ancient path is the narrow way; the ancient path is the path that My Christ trod along. He is indeed the One who paved the way. He IS the way, the truth and the life. Few there are who travel it to the end, and fewer still enter in at the strait gate. Do all you have learned through the Word and by My Holy Spirit.

Thus says the LORD, Stand ye in the ways and see, and ask for the old (ancient) paths, where is the good way, and walk therein, and you shall find rest for your souls. but they said, We will not walk therein.

Also I set watchmen over you,saying, Hearken to the sound of the trumpet. but they said, We will not hearken. (listen, take heed, pay attention) [Jer 6:16]

(End of the excerpt from the undated word given)

He is worthy to be praised for He has been so faithful in times past, even before I was saved.

By Him (Jesus/Yeshua) therefore let us offer the sacrifice of praise to God continually, that is, the fruit of our lips giving thanks to His name. [Heb 13:15]

Yet, offering up thanksgiving and praise meant that I had to fight every emotion, every feeling; every negative thought. I have much to be grateful for. 

Still on my knees with my face to the floor, I fought my flesh, pushing past that urge to lean on my own understanding. It was time to do all that I had learned and been trained to do. Praise God in all things! Praise Jesus in the storm!

I sought the LORD, and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears. 

[Ps 34:1-4]

It was a fight, a spiritual battle, a battle with the flesh and a battle against the adversary. It was time to put into practice everything that the Word of God tells us to do in trials and tribulations. By the grace of God and the help of His precious and Holy Spirit, I was doing it. I cried out for mercy and He granted it.

I had cried until I could cry no more. I had poured out everything that was in my heart; repented of all I could think of and moved into thanksgiving and praise. Spiritual warfare had taken place as well. Still, He was silent. As a battle-fatigued soul, I slowly got up from the floor. There was no more I could say or express.

The nose was blown, the tears were wiped away. I looked out to the lake and the mountains. What a beautiful world the Lord God created. I was exhausted. Sleep had been greatly deprived during this season of travailing and sorrow, so I lay down. Hours passed and my sleep was deep.

Though the Lord had been silent, when I awoke, I felt refreshed. Something was different. It was as if everything had climaxed and all the negativity, all the spent emotions, all the turmoil had been replaced by a peace, a great calm.

There were no more racing thoughts. No more condemnation. No more negativity. By His grace and mercy, God had done something deep within of me. Yes, that peace that passes all understanding had come over me, just as Jesus promised.

Something had happened. God had done something, but what? It was as if He had taken me into the eye of the storm and I was safe. He became my strong tower, my refuge, my shield. Then, as the worst of the storm passed, He set my feet once again upon the rock. Hope was restored – everything will be alright.

Yes, much still has to take place, and another season of waiting is upon me (and others), but the assurance is in knowing everything is in the hands of a competent, Sovereign God! I may have “moments” still to come, but I give Jesus all the glory for establishing my sanity once again, and stabilizing my instability.

Truly, beyond a shadow of doubt, God is worthy to be praised. Thank You, Jesus. It is because of what You did for us that we may approach the throne of God, our heavenly Father.

And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, shall keep (guard) your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. [Phil 4:7]

So, it was time to get back to writing again, having been strengthened by God, and God alone through Jesus Christ! I am absolutely positive that the prayers of faithful brethren were answered as well. May God answer the secret petitions of their hearts speedily and fully, for His glory.

Thank You Jesus, my Yeshua! Thank you my beloved brothers and sisters in the Lord! Each day I am strengthened and I look to Jesus for His guidance through the Holy Spirit. There are moments of uncertainty, but God is well able to redeem.

Behold, the hand is not shortened that it cannot save; neither His ear heavy that it cannot hear. [Is 59:1]

We are not alone in our trials. countless people all around the world are going through horrific times, in various ways of suffering. We all know this life is temporal, but that knowledge is not a comfort during times of trial and tribulation. But we who follow Jesus the Messiah can look to Him, an ever present help in trouble. He will help us through it, even when He is silent.

for His glory alone

Bonita                          dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com

On Dangerous Ground - Patiently Waiting

Patience

For you have need of patience, that after you have done the will of God, you might receive the promise. [Heb 10:36]

I realize that this article has been delayed longer than originally intended before being published, but quality triumphs over quantity. For God's glory alone! 

Patience! Time...waiting!  Ah, how impatient we creatures can be.  I used to think I was such a patient person.  Was I ever in for a rude awakening!

I could stand in lines ever so patiently whilst a cashier and a patron would be chatting, holding up a lineup of frustrated people (most times...my record isn't perfect).  
Or I could patiently wait in a traffic jam whilst others were angrily honking their horns and expressing annoyance (I really have not been stuck in many traffic jams in my life).  
Or I could patiently wait in a doctor’s office or an emergency waiting room (there were times that I did pace). Overall, I considered myself a rather patient woman.

In fact, there were times past that I have been so bold as to say that although I had flaws and imperfections, impatience was not one of them (sigh, and yes, I have witnesses who can attest to that statement).

Well, well,well – we should be careful how we make our boast, for surely the day arrives when such a boast is tried.  Life has a way of doing that. We also serve a Sovereign God who hears and sees all, and in the ways of His infinite wisdom, He may decide to reveal to us the perils of pride (or making a boast) and test an area where we are overly-confident...for our own good, of course.

Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall. [Prov 16:18]

We will find out precisely how much patience we have (or do not have) when we come face to face with something that we have absolutely no control over.  When tragedy, calamity or misfortune strike suddenly and powerfully (whether in body, soul or spirit), it can seem like more than we can bear. 

If a person has struggled with a besetting sin that overtakes them at times and they cannot seem to get victory over it, they may come to the edge of a precipice and with the slightest pressure (push) take a hard fall. 

Many times people who struggle with something seek help from others, such as counselors, friends, research etc, but are too ashamed to seek God’s help. The first person we should run to is God, through prayer.

The closer to home (personal) that a sudden, dramatic event, as well as the seriousness or severity of it, will gauge the depth it affects us. Some events will completely catch us off-guard, overwhelm us and temporarily shock us.

Once we are over the initial shock, it may cause us confusion, frustration, bewilderment, great inner pain and sorrow, grief, anger and/or a restlessness, as we seek answers to help us make sense of it. Answers help us with understanding so that we can cope with the situation. 

Answers can halt confusion, restlessness, and even in placing blame wrongfully. It is when we do not understand the 'why' or the 'how' or other unanswered questions that anger, bitterness and frustration mushroom.

But what happens when no sound answers are forthcoming? What do we do when things defy logic and nothing makes sense?  Most become impatient, tirelessly seeking answers, turning over every stone, looking for someone or something to place blame upon.

Many disciples of Christ have prayed for a miraculous intervention in an urgent situation. Their constant hope is that breakthrough or answers will come speedily.  However, if the answer is delayed or appears to be slow-coming, a Christian can begin to wonder if God even heard the prayer or if He even cares. 

When we have received visions or dreams and they seem delayed for great lengths of time, sometimes even years, we may begin to doubt that the dream or vision was from God. If the fulfillment takes too long, we may become impatient and fearful that it may not happen at all. We may even try to help God speed things up (remember Abraham and Sarah?).

Why is God not moving quicker?  Why won’t He answer? Has He said no? If He has, then why did the dream or vision come in the first place? Why did He confirm it at unexpected times and in unexpected ways? Where is mercy? Unanswered questions bring confusion and doubts, which can sneak in. Before we know it, the confident person may not be so confident anymore. 

What If…?

What if everything goes wrong at the same time, one thing after another, as an onslaught or as a domino effect? What if there are no answers, no explanations, no understanding, no logic or sense to it at all?  

What if it seems like a bitter end and a hopeless situation? What if the mountain seems too high to climb or unsurpassable? What if a dark valley seems so low that a finding a way to climb up and out appears futile?

What if those close to us, friends or family, are sympathetic at first, even praying fervently for us in the beginning, but as events continue on or multiply, they quit praying, weary of the turbulence and unrest that comes with a seemingly endless battle? 

Today, endless battles with a person is called 'drama'. It is true that there are some who thrive on drama, thrive on the attention they get, but the average person does all they can to avoid hardships.

We all have our own battles to fight and events to handle. There is no getting around it. By today's standards, Jesus (Yeshua) had a very dramatic life that some would say ended in tragedy. Oh, but the victory it brought when He was resurrected from the cold grave!

What if fellow believers think we are out of God’s will or that we are hiding a secret sin and we are under judgment, somehow being punished or chastened by the Lord until we repent? I call it the JFS, the Job's Friends Syndrome.

In the silence, you almost hear, ”Why don’t you curse God and die?”  (Words of Job’s wife when she was utterly consumed in her own grief, sorrow, anger and bitterness [Job 2:9]).  “Why don’t you just let it all go?” we might hear. 

‘Lord, is that You, and if so...why?’  Then, as if confusion and shock are not bad enough, what happens when things intensify and worsen? Surely, God has turned against us, we may think. 

What if we are so greatly shaken that we wonder if we (or our faith) will stand, or if we will be able to cope with it all? What if negative thoughts come as an invasion and we begin to question our sanity? Where is God in all of this? When negative thoughts inundate us, we may even wonder if we are saved or have we have somehow deceived ourselves, or been deceived?

What if suddenly it seems like friends and family are all busy, the phone becomes silent, no calls or texts, not even from an inquisitive telemarketer…not even so much as a troublesome ‘wrong number’?

What if the inbox of your email account dwindles to a strange stillness?  Even those who create the annoying spam emails seem to have given up on you. What if it everyone you counted on seems to have disappeared and your world seems to have come to a sudden, jolting halt?

What if it seems like everything is collapsing around you? What if a sudden upheaval leaves no way of escape, no way out and you are forced to accept it as reality? Do you still turn to Jesus? Do you still hold fast your faith?

What if there is a vast mountain blocking your destiny, or giants (strongmen, strongholds) stand in the way, taunting you, telling you that God has deserted you? What if the giants say that you are helpless to overcome them?  Do you surrender in defeat and become their unwilling slave?  In other words, do you give up or give in?

What if a loved one departs from this earth?  What if the solid relationship between you and your beloved crumbles before your eyes and the throes of betrayal and rejection envelope you?

What if your beloved is as one who unknowingly gives into temptation and sin, quite content with the pleasure the veiled seduction brings? What if pride takes a beating and you are greatly humbled?  

What if fear and doubt knock relentlessly at the door of your heart? What if moods become unpredictable, emotions climb high at a snail’s pace and feelings plunge to great depths at lightning speed, with ups, downs, twists and turns akin to a rollercoaster ride?

What if, as a believer, you fight against the very depths of despair and sorrow? What if you seek God, crying out and your desperate prayers seem unanswered? What if God is silent too? What if someone you know has gone off to war or is at the hands of a merciless enemy and is senselessly tortured and slaughtered?

Will the heaviness of the burden overwhelm you, will you yourself contemplate suicide, or will you plead with God to end your life, as the lies of Satan bombard your mind and quench your spirit?  Will you return to Egypt and captivity, or will you seek God and pray until the peace that passes all understanding comes?

What if you have given up because you feel God has forgotten about you or has stopped loving you?  What if it has been just one too many battles, one long, continuous way, one dramatic thing after another...and you just want it to stop! 

What if it seems like witchcraft or some curse is against you, or that so much is wrong that reversal or a miraculous intervention seem impossible? 

What if Satan is allowed to sift you as wheat?  What if the fire in the furnace of affliction is turned up seven times hotter? What if the battle rages, with no sign of retreat, relief or any escape? What if your sanity seems to have left you and you wonder if in all the trials, you have become mad (insane)?

Will we trust that God still cares and is Sovereign?  Will we allow fear and doubt to lead us into unbelief that consumes us, causing us to rebel?  Will we have the patience to wait for God and to endure to the end, or will our faith fail us? Will we walk around robotically, numb about life, void of any feelings, having wept until we can weep no more?

What if God’s timing seems too long?  What if, what if, what if...?

Will we continue to practice patience and faith and wait, or will we give up? Has God slammed all doors shut? If so, why? Will He let us know if He has?
Whatever situation, whatever scenario, if you are at your wit's end or if you feel worthless and without value or hope, I urge you to please keep reading.

Before I was saved, I heard something I did not quite understand at the time, but a thing I never forgot. I have posted it several times over the past years, which is that ‘the strongest onslaught is just before the victory”. 

In other words, we can expect the greatest opposition (the fiercest fight) just before the victory. David Wilkerson once said, “The hardest part of faith is the last half hour.”  

It is when we are close to God’s answer that faith is tried the hardest. Brother Wilkerson went on to say that many Christians quit (give up) within “the last half hour” of their long fight.

Don't give up, friend! Do not! Hold on just a little longer, focusing on Jesus and not the circumstances, or negative words of well-meaning friends.

Wait patiently. Yes, just awhile longer!

Don’t Give Up

Have you ever seen an athlete begin a race strongly and confidently, only to quickly weary in the last lap?  He looks behind him and sees the competition closing the gap and coming up fast behind him.

He loses his focus. He begins to doubt, despite all his hard training and ability.  His coach is rooting him on, shouting to the athlete, ‘you can do it’, but his words are drowned out by the sound of the approaching runners. The coach grows silent. The crowd watches.

Doubt and fear begin to weigh down on the runner. “I'm not gonna make it, I don’t have the strength.” “I should never have listened to my coach. How could he possibly think I was ready for this?” “I can't do this! It hurts like hell!"

The finish line begins to look much further than it actually is. The runner begins to slow down. The hounds of defeat are nipping at the heels of the runner. The finish line is only feet ahead of him. He is so close, but suddenly, he trips and stumbles and violently falls. The crowd gasps. “Get up, get up!” they shout.

“You can do this! Keep going! I’m here for you. Remember your training. You know what to do if this happens. Get up!”  His coach encourages him. A team mate may even stop to see if he is alright and encourage him to keep going. 

Yet, the athlete only feels the pain of defeat, believing the lies laced with fear. Instead of rising again, he becomes ashamed and guilt-ridden, thus quitting just before the finish line, just before embracing the joy that comes with victory.  

Are you as the athlete, starting strong and confident, but after a trip and hard fall, you have given up (or are ready to give up) just before the finish line, when victory is so close?  Do not give up! Rise up. 

Shake off the dirt of unbelief and defeat!  Replace fear with faith, and unbelief with trust in God! Take up your shield of faith (even if it is as small as a mustard seed). Arise! Look to Jesus and put your confidence and hope in God. Let trust spur you on to victory.

Focus on Jesus and not the circumstances. Believe that God will see you through. He created you, trained you, instructed you. Forget the shame of the fall. Do not allow unbelief to defeat you, for it will lead you into rebellion. If Jesus is your Lord, He is with you, even in the silence. He is the Great Encourager, our hope. He never fails!

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which does so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,

Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. [Heb 12:1, 2]

Fear and Unbelief – Deadly Enemies

My intent and motive for this article is that it will act as a lifesaver to those who can no longer tread the relentless waves of the raging sea of desperation. May this writing be a shining light amidst the foreboding darkness that is enveloping the discouraged and weary soul. May it open your eyes to see the hand of Jesus Christ (Yeshua) extended out toward you, to lift you up out of the turbulent waters.

This is meant as a timely reminder for those who have forgotten that God is for them and not against them.  Jesus said that all who hunger and thirst after righteousness should come to Him. He is the way, the truth and life. [Jn 14:6]

We all need reminders; we all need encouragement and we all need prayer. God is the provider of His people. His ways and thoughts are truly far beyond ours [Is 55:8, 9]; He never wearies and His understanding is unsearchable – so great is His wisdom, creativity and LOVE [Is 40:28].

Suffering comes in many ways, which may very well be combined with pain and sorrow (whether in body, soul or spirit).  When hardship comes, it is never welcome. If it persists, we want it to end…doesn’t matter how, we just want the hardship, the trial, the misery to end. 

We try every way we know to make things right, but more often than not, we find that no matter what we try, nothing works.  We feel helpless because there is nothing we can possibly do to change things and if it carries on long enough, we begin to feel like we do not have the strength to bear up.

When things are beyond our control, it frustrates and angers us. The “why” questions never receive a satisfactory answer.  Do you know why most people give up? You may not agree, but it is so.

This may be hard for you to swallow, but it is something that I have learned to be truth. The thing that causes most people to give up…is that they give into unbelief!  

Some people succumb to fear by listening to all the doubt. Do you know that quite often, certain friends, family or acquaintances that you may confide in, may actually advise you in the wrong way? 

True that there is safety in a multitude of counselors, but what if they are not godly counselors? What if they do not pray about a thing, but advise you based on their own feelings or understanding?

We are to seek godly counsel. We have been to take all things to the Lord in prayer, with thanksgiving, letting Him know our requests. Then, we wait on God.

Many become overwhelmed with frustration, bitterness, unforgiveness, anger, even pride. O, pride can be ever so subtle, I have learned.

Patient waiting will turn drastically to unbelief when our focus turns inwardly (to self), looking at the impossible circumstances, not casting down (out) negative thoughts, or listening to unwise advice that ungodly counsel may bring. If we focus on self, and not upwardly to Jesus, unbelief will find strength.  
The shift in focus can be so slow and subtle that it is barely noticeable, yet even someone who is strong in faith can be shaken to the max. Will faith hold fast or will it not?

With light there is no obscured vision, such as when all is cloaked in darkness. Therefore, we must look to God. If we look away from Jesus, who is Light, and look toward any other direction, our eyes will only see the gloom of darkness.

A Very Real Adversary

Many people ignore or deny the fact that we have a very real adversary. He comes to steal, kill and destroy [Jn 10:10].  He can whisper lies so gently and convincingly that if we are not careful, we may listen. We may even think that it is God speaking.  

If you have heard from God (which never contradicts His Word or His character), and are waiting for answered prayer or a miraculous intervention, Satan will try to plant seeds of doubt…”has God said?” 

What is even worse is that he is a master ventriloquist, but we will learn the good Shepherd's voice, as all lambs do. He said His "sheep" (mature ones) know His voice and follow Him. [Jn 10:27]

Satan may even try to convince you that you are losing it, your mind has snapped and you have been deceived. Or he will push hard against the foundation of your faith, blasting it with violent winds. You may be greatly shaken but the house build upon the Rock will not fall. It will remain standing.

However, the Sovereign God may well permit the adversary to have his way, or the Lord may choose to intervene and stop Satan. People continuously parrot the words, “Satan cannot do anything that God does not allow.” 

That is a blanket statement that does not cover all. In fact, it is akin to saying, "We cannot do anything that God does not allow." Do you understand my point? We can sin and say, "God allowed it." We must be wise in our understanding. Wisdom comes from God through the Holy Spirit and through reading the Bible.

This is no game that we are involved in. We are not pawns on a chessboard being moved around by a playoff between God and Satan, as some artists would have us think when they present such images to us. 

The truth of the matter is the fact that God is indeed Sovereign! The souls of mankind are so important to God that He sent Jesus Christ to make a way to be forgiven of sins and reconciled back to Him. 

Our eternal future is a serious matter to God. He does not play with our minds, souls or bodies. He created us; He loves us. Most people make the statement about Satan not being able to do anything God does not allow based on the Bible story of Job.

Satan had appeared before God to ask Him to remove the "hedge of protection" surrounding Job, so that Satan could put Job to the test and bring destruction. People tend to believe that we automatically have a hedge of protection around us as soon as we come to Christ, but do we? [More on this later]

The above is only one instance where Satan asked permission to bring evil upon a person, yet I would caution each disciple of Christ Jesus to understand fully what they are saying before they speak and to carefully consider their words before establishing them as fact.  

Some people blame Satan for everything, when in reality it is the our own sins or the sins of others that bring about its own evil. Lucifer's rebellion caused his fall. He was cast down from heaven, along with a third of now-unholy angels.

                  

For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life, is not of the Father, but is of the world.  [1 Jn 2:16]

Idolatry, covetousness, fornication, adultery, rape, murder, homosexuality, greed, pride, arrogance, drunkenness, all forms of abuse, witchcraft, unforgiveness, and every other sin most often comes under one or more of the categories mentioned in 1 John, revealed in the above scripture. 

Would you dare to say that sin is God’s will? Yet the same people who say that God is Sovereign and that Satan must ask permission to do anything to people are often the same people that state that we are not robots or puppets. 

That is paradoxical. Others are often unknowingly negligent in remembering that we are free to make choices and that those choices can cause us to sin, and to reap the consequences of those sins.

We can give into temptation freely (choice) and thereby sin. Jesus Himself was tempted, but He did not give into sin. He countered every temptation with the Word of God because He IS the Word of God who comes in the flesh.

To say that Satan asks God’s permission before he attacks or brings evil upon people is a generalization that indirectly and ignorantly dumps all manner of evil and sins at God’s feet, thereby paving a way to blame God whenever things go wrong and we can find no one else to blame. 

Since we are in a bloody war, Satan does not play fair. He does not approach God for every attack and every evil intent he plans. Remember, we are talking about a fallen angel, a once-holy angel that rebelled against a holy God and persuaded one-third of the angels to join him in his prideful rebellion.

Do you really think this same angel, now unholy and fallen from God's grace, who defied God and led a heavenly rebellion is suddenly going to humble himself and ask God's permission for every attack and move he makes against God's creation?  No, he is filled with pride and arrogance, so much so that he has deceived himself about his own power. 

He does not ask permission every time he makes a move, but God keeps a watchful eye. We may not always understand why God allows what He allows, but we know that He will work things out.  

He can turn things for our good when we trust in Him. Whether or not something is a test, or a way of maturing and molding us to prepare us for eternity, we may not always find out here, but we can and must trust God.

Remember when Paul wanted to return to Thessalonica to be with the persecuted there, he could not make it. He wrote a letter stating that Satan "hindered us" from going at that time. [Thess 2:18]

Consider also Daniel who had been fasting and praying. He was seeking God in prayer for the interpretation of his vision. What happened? Gabriel was sent with a message for Daniel, but he was stopped by Satan and his minions. The battle was of such greatness that Michael had to go to Gabriel's aid. 

Precisely how long the battle ensued is not stated, but it is written that Daniel was fasting and praying three weeks, asking for and awaiting an answer. It must have seemed to him that God was silent, but Daniel kept on seeking God.

If Satan had approached God to ask permission to interfere, there would have been no need for God to send Michael forth to battle alongside Gabriel so that he could deliver God's message to Daniel. 

Yet Satan presented a battle so intense that Michael was sent in as reinforcement to end the conflict. Daniel would indeed receive his answer to prayer, but he had to wait patiently, even though he had no idea why God's answer was so long in coming.

Then said he unto me, Fear not, Daniel: for from the first day that you did set your heart to understand, and to chasten yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I am come for your words.

But the prince of the kingdom of Perisa (the spiritual entity [principality] that was controlling the earthly prince and kings of Persia) withstood me one and twenty days: but lo, Michael, one of the chief princes came to help me; and I remained there with the kings of Persia. [Dan 10:12, 13]

Humble yourself. Fall to your knees if necessary, as the apostles did. There is a way out of discouragement, hopelessness and delays in answers to prayer and to avoid falling into the trap of fear and unbelief, which lead to rebellion. 

Fervent Prayer of Righteous Avails Much

Do you remember the time when someone told Jesus that the apostles could not cast out a demon, and Jesus rebuked them for their unbelief?  Did Jesus give up on the apostles right then and there because they fell into unbelief? Obviously not!  The apostles learned and went on to do mighty works and miracles in the name of Jesus the Messiah.  

At one point in time, they did give up on Jesus. They ran from the Garden of Gethsemane when Judas betrayed Him and Jesus (Yeshua) was arrested. They hid and could not be found. Peter denied Jesus three times. Yes, he repented, but did Jesus not forewarn him that Satan had desired to sift Peter as wheat?  

Yet Jesus prophesied that Peter’s faith would not fail him, for He had prayed to the Father for Peter. He had interceded on Peter’s behalf. Jesus did not forsake His chosen apostles, even when fear and unbelief overcame them. 

His prayers were effective. After His ascension, Jesus' words returned to the hearts and minds of the apostles and they rose up again, becoming examples for us to follow. Jesus will not forsake us either. He intercedes on our behalf. 

We must rise again and go forth. We must seek God, who will help us to persevere, when we pray in the Spirit [Eph 6:18] Perseverance is found only once in the Holy Scriptures, which is Ephesians 6, verse 18. 

Do you not find it interesting that the word “perseverance” is nestled into the section that exhorts us to put on our armour and warns us about what enemies we wrestle against?  

Read chapter six, paying particular attention to verses 11-18; the latter verse being the one which speaks of perseverance.  It is no misplaced word. It is linked with ''watching'' and with instructions to always pray (not only for ourselves), but for all saints.

We are one Body (in and of Christ) and need each other’s prayers. If Jesus was led to pray for his apostles and all disciples (both then and those yet to come), then how much more should we pray one for another.  Jesus prayed for His apostles, as well as for all future believers (disciples).

Neither pray I for these alone (His apostles), but for them also which believe on Me through their word (present and future believers); That they all may be one; as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You, that they also may be one in us: that the world may believe that You have sent Me. [Jn 17:20, 21]

Rise and Rise Again

How many are in situations or circumstances that require waiting on God’s timing? People waiting for salvation (for others, particularly loved ones), healing and/or deliverance (either for themselves or for loved ones); a miracle, a divine intervention, answers to prayers – multitudes of believers wait patiently for God’s timing.  This is not a new thing…

How many are weary of waiting? How many are struggling with a stronghold (mountains) or strongmen (giants) and feel that they will never get the victory?  How many are listening to the whispers of Satan and are going in a direction that God has not ordained, but they think it must be God’s will? 

Always pray about everything. Try (test) EVERY spirit to see if it is of God.  The warning is written about the false prophets who have gone out into the world Beware the counterfeiter; he is the father of lies.

A rising concern is that the majority of believers have grown weary (tired and impatient) and are either on the verge of giving up, or sadly, have given up.  If you are tempted to give up, feeling hopeless, useless and perhaps even wondering why God is not moving on your behalf or why He has not answered urgent prayers (some even with fasting), I urge you, “Rise up!”

If you have fallen and are listening to the voice (lies) of defeat, I urge you, “Trust God. Believe Jesus and rise again. Get back in the race.”  If God has instructed you, then hold fast to faith. Fight the good fight, for our God is the LORD of the battle. 

His arm is not shortened that it cannot save, neither is He unable to hear our prayers. We must pray to Him, confessing any sin. Ask Him for help if you are struggling, pray repentance. Do not let pride hinder you from confessing sin.

Do not listen to Satan, who constantly whispers lies. No good works will save us. Only the precious blood of the Lamb, poured out and sprinkled upon the cross, will save those who believe and receive His mercy and forgiveness. It is a gift to mankind. Cry out for justice and plead for truth. God is faithful. [Is 59:1-4]

Do not focus on the giant(s) before you. Do not listen to the negative reports (words). The Jordan can be crossed.  There is no need to die in the wilderness.  God gives the victory before the battle! 

[…] Thus says the Lord unto you, Be not afraid or dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours, but God’s.  [2 Chron 20:15]

Do not be afraid of the giants and give into fear, doubts and discouragement, no matter what things look like; no matter how fierce the battle rages and no matter how many times you fall. When you have confessed any sin, receive God’s forgiveness with thanksgiving.

What comes after chapter 59 of Isaiah, after the Word rebukes sin and the people prayed?  They had the fear of the Lord and knew their God.  The Lord said that when the enemy comes in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord shall lift up a standard against him.

The promise of a Redeemer and a new covenant is prophesied. Through Christ Jesus, we have the victory. I exhort you; I urge you.  Do not take on shame and guilt. Seek God, confess your sins and repent of any unbelief, doubt or fear.  Then, rise and rise again! The Lord is with you.

After chapter 59, which encompasses that which is written above, chapter 60 begins with encouraging words and a promise. 

ARISE, shine, for your light is come, and the glory of the Lord is risen upon thee. For behold, the darkness shall cover the earth, and gross darkness the people: but the LORD shall arise upon you, and HIS GLORY shall be seen upon you.  [Is 60:1, 2]

When All Seems Lost – Hope Deferred

Trust God in all things, no matter how difficult. Cast down all vain imaginings, all lies, all doubts and fear, all thoughts that would lead you to unbelief.  If we focus on our circumstances instead of on Christ Jesus, our hope will indeed be dashed and we will feel sick deep within. Fear God and stand on His Word.

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the holy One is understanding. [Prov 9:10]

The fear of the LORD is the beginning of knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline. [Prov 1:7]

Teach me your way, o Lord, and I will walk in your truth; give me an undivided heart, that I may fear Your name.  [Ps 86:11]

Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep His commandments; for this is the whole duty of man.  [Eccl 12:13]

There are plenty of scriptures that speak of the fear of the Lord, as well as of those who have no fear of God, but the above verses give some insight into what it means to fear God. 

It is linked with wisdom, discipline, an undivided heart and obedience, for starters.  Other scriptures lean toward ‘awe’ of God’s divine majesty, fear of punishment for sins and God’s power and might.  

I was watching a documentary one time about two volcanologists (someone who studies volcanoes, in hopes of predicting eruptions and to save lives).  They were filming an erupting volcano from a safe distance, with a zoom lens on their camera.

As the lava spit forth and cascaded down the mountainside, one volcanologist said, “I cannot see how anyone can doubt that there is a God and remain an atheist once they witness the destructive, fiery power of a volcanic eruption, the release of megatons of thermal energy and the plumes of steam and ash that spew forth.  To witness it makes one realize how small and powerless we humans really are.”  

Today, there are fewer Christians that truly fear God. It goes beyond reverence, awe, respect and honour, although that is normally the explanation given. Some Christians do not care to know the Hebrew or Greek meaning of a word, stating that it is not their language and they do not speak it, so why bother? 

Since the scrolls were first written in Hebrew and Greek, learning the meanings of words does help to put things into context and proper perspective.

“Fear” as in the ‘fear of the Lord’ comes from the Hebrew word “l’yirah” – feminine of “yare’”.  Strong’s definition: fear (also used as infinitive), morally reverence, dreadful, exceedingly, fear (fullness), terror

To think that the Creator of all has the power to speak things into existence and with just one word could take our next breath away. He also has the power to send people to the lake of fire, known as the second death.  [Rev 20:14]

We are to have a healthy and productive fear of the Lord.  We should not see Him as a harsh disciplinarian or taskmaster, but as a loving Creator with great power and might.  So great is His love for us that He sent Christ Jesus, His Son as a way to have everlasting life, by believing in Him.

Should we fear man or this world because of its evil more than we fear a good Creator, who allowed His precious Son to die a cruel death upon a rugged cross, but had the power to raise Him up from the dead after three days in the tomb? 

To put things in proper perspective, remember this:

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril or sword?  As it is written, For Your sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep to the slaughter. Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him that loved us.

For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. [Rom 8:35-38]

In summarization, it is healthy to fear the Lord, whilst keeping in mind His great love for us and all that Jesus the Christ accomplished on the cross, so that we can be cleansed, forgiven and reconciled back to our holy Creator.

So why do we reach the brink of despair and hopelessness when trials and tribulation come?  Why do we faint or grow weary when we must wait patiently for God’s timing to bring answers to prayer, or to move on our behalf?  Could it be that when we become weary and grow weak, we lose our focus, which should be Jesus and instead begin to focus on self and our circumstances?

Hope deferred makes the heart sick: but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life. [Prov 13:12]

Did Peter not take his eyes off of Jesus and look at the raging waves of the sea?  He felt the wind whip his clothing against his body. As the power and energy of the wind mingled with the water, Peter's dampened hair was blown about and mercilessly stung his face and hindered his vision. 

He fought to keep his wind-tossed hair away from his eyes, so he could clearly see everything that was happening. He observed and felt the reality of his circumstances and fear gripped his heart. He began to sink. “Lord, save me!”  He cried out!

Jesus was right there with him, yet Peter began to doubt. Doubt led to fear, which overtook his faith, then unbelief consumed him and he began to sink deeper into the midst of his situation. 

What happened when he asked Jesus to save him?  Jesus reached out and grabbed him, but rebuked him for doubting. Then, the moment that Jesus and Peter entered the ship, the wind ceased, the raging storm stopped. 

And immediately Jesus stretched forth His hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O you of little faith, why did you doubt?  [Mat 14:31]

If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength (faith) is small.  [Prov 24:10]

Peter was so close to victory. He was so close to being and standing in the same place where Jesus stood upon the water, but he listened to the whispers of doubt (Satan's lying voice of defeat).  

Is this not what happens with us?  Do we hear Satan's voice of defeat, as he whispers his lies to us?  Do we forget that when the lies are spoken, Jesus is right there with us, watching, waiting for us to trust and to come to Him. Do we begin to doubt?

Do we focus on the tempestuous circumstances and the tumultuous emotions it brings, having been catapulted by a fury of thoughts (fiery arrows)?  Do we entertain doubts, thus unknowingly surrendering to fear and unbelief? 

Do we begin to question all the good that we believed God brought our way? Do we begin to think we have been deceived or that God betrayed us? Do we begin to sink into the swirling, confused churning of the situation and circumstances that we find ourselves thrown into? 

Do we believe we will drown in the relentless turmoil and merciless upheaval of our surroundings? Do we wonder why we were ever born, or if we are even saved? Is our faith shaken as the winds of adversity beat against us and heavy burdens are likened to a torrential downpour? 

Satan wants us to doubt the love and faithfulness of God, of Jesus (Yeshua).  When God is silent, Satan will suggest that He is angry with us, that God is finished with us, that He is no longer cares and that He is not listening to our prayers. 

Satan will press us to give up as the hopelessness that he brings, along with the thoughts (fiery darts) that he injects into our minds, begins to envelopes us. That is the very hour, the very moment that we must raise faith as a shield.

Above all, taking the shield of faith, with which you shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. [Eph 6:16]

The wicked one is our adversary (Satan), who will use every weapon in his arsenal to keep us from our destiny, to rob us of hope, to kill our love for God and to destroy our faith. He wants us to let go of what God has ordained for us and to lead us in a completely different direction (a broad road with many pleasure that satisfy the eyes, the flesh and pride), a road leading away from Jesus and into some temptation that he has selected especially for us. 

He will suggest that we have been deceived and that what we have believed for is not of God, accusing of of believing nothing but false hope and illusion.  He does not yell his lies at us, but instead whispers quietly to us. He is a expert ventriloquist, who imitates the voice of the Shepherd. 

The sheep know the voice of their Shepherd, but if they are sick, weak, downtrodden, in a frightful place or impatient, they may be temporarily fooled because their focus is misdirected and their vision blurred. The serpent is the father of lies, a murderer from the beginning.

When battles are long or the waiting upon the Lord for His timing seems endless, then hope may be deferred and the heart grows sick. Satan's hate and wrath, particularly against believers, are very real.  He will endeavour to make us doubt God's love, mercy and grace. 

If Satan can infiltrate our thoughts, he will present all kinds of imaginations. If we entertain the thoughts he brings, we are in danger of embracing his lies. If we embrace his lies, we water the seeds of doubt he planted. We will then harvest unbelief and eat the fruit thereof (rebellion). 

If we love God, we will obey Him. Obedient trust will wait upon His timing. If the wait is long, we must trust His timing and allow our faith to undergird our patience.

Unbelief is the opposite of trusting God and it will hinder us from obeying. If we see that we have fallen into this trap (by allowing circumstances to overtake us), then we must repent fear and unbelief and choose to stand in faith and trust God.

Without faith, it is impossible to please Him: for he that comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of them that diligently seek Him. [Heb 11:6] 

That verse is found in what I call the "faith chapter" because it speaks of all the forerunners who "by faith" obey God, waited on His timing and received their promises and victories. Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham and Sarah, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, Rahab, Gideon, David and Samuel, as well as others, are all named in chapter eleven of Hebrews as examples of those who walked by faith.

If God is silent after we have earnestly prayed, Satan will take advantage of it. Just because the Lord may be quiet for a season does not mean that He does not care or has not heard us, nor does it mean that He is not working in the invisible realm, doing things that we cannot see.

The silence may cause us to quit praying, to avoid reading the Word of God. We may become discouraged and impatient and begin to falter. We must set our face as flint, especially when we cannot see or understand what is happening or what God is doing. Then we grow impatient; we will not wait upon the Lord.  We will either give up or go off on a broad path that Satan has put before us.

If we are not careful, pride and selfishness can overtake us.  If God delays, will you throw in the towel, give up on what He has promised you, or will you listen to the whispered lies of the devil?  If you listen to Satan, you will grow discontented and impatient.

Seducing Spirits

He will bring in every distraction, every hindrance, every seduction, according to our weaknesses and fleshly desires/lusts. The joy and happiness Satan brings is temporal. Sin is pleasant only for a season. We will reap what we have sown.

I urge the reader (and remind myself also), do not let your vision become clouded by your present circumstances and situations.  Do not doubt God's promises to you. Do not put "self" on the throne. Allow Jesus the King to rule.

No matter what negative report you hear, and no matter what things look like, do not embrace it hastily.  Do not abort your prayers, especially when they seem to be unanswered (God is silent). Do not let Satan rob you of your destiny or your victory in Christ Jesus.

When doubt, fear and unbelief threaten to overtake us, it is the very time that we must search our hearts. Will we ask the Lord to search our hearts to reveal anything that is not of Him, anything that may be hindering His answer? 

Will we humble ourselves, confessing our weakness in patience and waiting, as well as confessing any sin that may be hindering us from overcoming? Will we surrender all to Him? When we humble ourselves, the Lord will lift us up. [Jam 4:10]

Will we lay down our lives for Jesus and be rid of any idol (anything that takes His place upon the throne of our hearts)? Did you know that "self" can be an idol? Why do you think we are instructed to pick up our cross daily and die to self? Do we obey our flesh, doing whatever it bids us do, or do we obey God?

Will we repent and will we ask God to help us if we are too weak to overcome any besetting sin or any lustful weakness that we struggle with?

We are in a bloody and tiresome spiritual battle.  Whether we want to accept that reality or not, it will not change the fact that we are. We not only war (wrestle/struggle) against our flesh and its desires and appetites, we wrestle against principalities and powers, rulers of darkness and spiritual wickedness in high places.

If you are in a prison of grief and pain, shame or guilt where there seems to be no escape or any end, I counsel you to take time to read Psalm 28, Psalm 39 and Psalm 13 to strengthen your spirit man. 

If friends cannot be found in your dark hour, encourage yourself in the Lord as Joshua and David did. Despite the grievous situations they were in, they hoped in the Lord. They trusted in Him and He did not disappoint them.

Be Strengthened and Encouraged

I will end the first part of this article with a word from the Lord that was posted in times past. May it strengthen the weary and encouraged the discouraged.

Forever o Lord, Thy Word is settled in heaven. [Ps 119:89]

Stand fast! Yes, stand fast and wait upon Me [the Lord]. I know you have been shaken strongly, even sifted as wheat. I know you feel weak spiritually (exhausted). Perhaps you feel spiritually disoriented.

Fear not, be strong in Me. Rest in Me. Quickly you shall be strengthened if you wait on Me. I am with you in this - yea, I am in all that concerns you. There are more battles fast approaching. War is coming.

For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. [Eph 6:12]

You have done well in all the tests (gold is tested and purified), and in the trials (silver is refined), and in tribulations (times of preparation). Akita mani yo, mi'kola. [Observe everything as you walk the path (in life), my friend]

Yea, I call you friend. You are My child, who has proven to serve Me with loyalty despite the attempts of the enemy to have you, 'Curse God and die.', (Job's wife to Job) or even in, 'Has God said?' (serpent to Eve)

Then said his wife unto him, Do you still retain thine integrity? Curse God, and die [the adversary wants you to give up] [Job2:9]

Now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, has God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden? [the adversary plants doubt to birth unbelief] [Gen3:1]

Yea, rest in Me, waiting upon Me and I shall give you rest. I shall quickly strengthen you, for the hour is late. As spoken to Joshua, Gideon and David the king, so I say to you, "I give you victory." 

You shall overcome the adversary and all the enemies of the cross, when you do as I command and go where and when I direct you (obey).

For they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and the word of their testimony; and they loved not their life unto death. [Rev 12:11]

Yours, O LORD, is the greatness, and the power, and the glory, and the victory, and the majesty: for all that is in the heaven and in the earth is Yours; thine is the kingdom, O LORD, and You are exalted as head [Christ]above all 

[1Chro 29:11]

But thanks be to God, which gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ [1Cor 15:57]

And having spoiled principalities and powers, He made a show of them openly, triumphing over them in it. [† the cross] [Col 2:15]

Who led thee through that great and terrible wilderness, wherein were fiery serpents, and scorpions, and drought, where there was no water; who brought thee forth water out of the rock of flint [Deu 8:15]

Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you. [Lk 10:19]

You have stood fast and true, even in moments when you could not bring yourself to speak to Me due to emotions, but your heart kept repentant, as did king David's. This is not the time to give up with unbelief.

You certainly believe that I can do all things and repeatedly, at given opportunities, you testify to My power. With Me, nothing is impossible [Mat 19:36] nor is My arm shortened that it cannot save. [Is 59:] Yes, you do believe I can do all things, so would you allow unbelief to come forward to command you now?

Warrior, through My Son Jesus and Him alone; you have all authority. Prepare for another battle. It shall not be a long one. FEAR NOT, for lo, I AM with you. You shall walk by faith and not by sight. Come near to Me for already you feel a stirring deep within your spirit. I AM preparing and have prepared you, teaching you all along, even in times of silence.

Continue to trust Me as you rest in Me, waiting for Me. Strength comes. Unbelief dies as trust triumphs! Fear dies as faith lives. Let all things of the past go now, for it is dead and gone.  Trust in Me, and as you rest, I shall strengthen you.

Now is not the time to give up in frustration, anger, doubt or unbelief. Now is not the time to toss away what I have ordained or quit in hopelessness. 

Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and He shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD. [Ps 27:14]

When you are strengthened, go and encourage the brethren and do not tire of speaking to those who are lost and to those held captive. Do not be concerned with the look upon the faces. My love in you must reach out to those in danger of damnation. The mercy I have shown towards you will grant you patience,

Repent therefore and be converted, that your sins may be blotted out, when the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord; And He shall send Jesus Christ, who before was preached unto you  [Acts 3:19,20]

But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary, and they shall walk, and not faint.  [Is 40:31]

Rise Up with Faith

I have repeatedly assured you that you have not been deceived, for I am not man that I should lie nor have I allowed flesh or demon to deceive you, for I heard your earnest prayer to be protected from deception. Be confident in Me and trust Me. This trial is not forever.

My timing is perfect. Do that which I ask you to do and I shall keep my personal covenant with you; your vision shall manifest. It does not tarry, though it tarry (seems to tarry), it will be on time.

Rise up with faith.

Believe me for the things I say to you. I AM still the same yesterday, today and forever. I have given you scriptures; I have spoken to you and given you signs. I have saved you from death; I have answered your prayers in the past. Do not fall into the wickedness of unbelief.

Every time I test you, you wonder where I am. Every time, you have cried out to me and I carried you through each time. How many times shall I test you before you will remain steadfast and confident? Do you not see how far you have come and the times you have risen back up, or do you see only the times you fell?

Now rise up again in confidence…or stay in unbelief. Set aside lusts (lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes and pride of life). Ask Me to keep you from deception. How do I keep you from deception? I protect you as you obey Me. I promised I would lead you if you trust me with all your heart (in all things) and lean NOT to your own understanding.

Seek ye first the kingdom of God and all these things shall be added unto you.

Do not die in your sin. Do not die in unforgiveness; release any bitterness. Do not die in unbelief. Fear and unbelief lead to rebellion. Instead, pick up your cross and die to self. Stand strong. So many want to be part of the remnant, but they faint in the time of testing, right at the end of the trial. Believe Me in all circumstances, even when you do not understand.

The time has come to make a decision – no matter what happens, nothing can shake you enough to fall way IF you trust Me. If you are ready to commit and DO – to cross the Jordan, leaving the old behind (Egypt) and cross over into the promises given. There is a cost; it is obedience – laying all of the old down.

Do not murmur or complain; wringing your hands and crying out, “Why, why, why?" Rather determine that no matter what, you will trust in Me. No more doubts, no more fears.

Be warriors of endurance, not casualties of despair. Faith produces obedience to Me and My revealed word. I will direct your steps as you trust in Me, but direction requires obedience (following direction)

Feelings will betray you; but obedience brings victory. Trust Me. when I tell you a thing. Do not say, Lord God, I believe help my unbelief; but rather: “Lord, I believe your word. I hear it in my heart; I read it in your word, for faith comes by hearing and hearing by the Word of God.”

Fear the Lord for it is the beginning of wisdom. Testing is not My wrath; it is my goodness to refine you. Commit to Me and I will guide you. Honour My word. Trust Me. It is time to rise up in faith and trust My timing. Wait patiently awhile longer.

Continue to: Part TWO – Dangerous Ground

for His glory alone

Bonita                      dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com