Apples everywhere - much to learn |
The Upsetting of the
Apple Cart
When something comes
along in our lives that deeply affects us because it is intensely personal, is
it the proverbial upsetting of the apple cart, or is it the righteousness of
God who humbles us, to see what is in our heart, and whether we would still
obey Him [His Word]? [Deut 8:2]
This happens to
whomsoever the living God chooses, and it has nothing to do with chastening (punishment/discipline),
judgment, or consequences. It is a test, period. Being under grace does not
mean that Abba will not test our heart, or our faith. He has every right too.
Not everything
negative that comes at us is a test or trial; nor is it necessarily an attack
from Satan or his demonic forces. It may not be a result of sin, whether yours
or someone else’s. It may just be the result of human error, natural
calamities, or simply the unfairness of life in a fallen, corrupted world.
The great tribulation
is already rearing its horned, beastly head upon the horizon, and its shadow
has enveloped the entire earth in foreboding [spiritual] darkness. Evil
has accelerated at high-hypersonic speed. Abominations, rebellion, violence,
and lawlessness are everywhere. The Lord wants us prepared for what is coming.
We keep watching and
praying, doing our best to align things with the Word of God. We trust God, but
can we be trusted? It is said that despite good intentions, we do
not really know what a person is like until they are in a crisis. Then, the
heart of the person is exposed, and their real character comes forth.
Brethren [saints] around the world are already suffering persecution, torture, kidnapping, human trafficking, all manner of atrocities, including death, all for believing in Jesus/Yeshua. They stand fast, refusing to let go of their Saviour.
Would you? Would I? If
the Lord tarries, we may find out. It has already begun in North America and it shall increase. It is time to make a stand, and make it sure.
It is a given that
every person has inner struggles, things of the flesh, negative thoughts that
must be cast down or attitudes that must be subdued. Sometimes we ourselves are
unaware of certain things that can cause us to sin, lurking in the caves, in the
hidden crevices of the soul, until God brings something to our attention, or
puts us to the test, as a loving Father and as a Good Shepherd.
Children of darkness,
or people of pride [powerful emotion] do not concern themselves with the
things of God. It is foolishness to them. If you oppose them, they may become
violent or verbally abusive (or both). If you do not accept them for who
they are, that is ‘on you’; you are ‘nothing’ to them.
It is hard to believe
evil people like that exist, but we must face the reality that there are reprobate
people in this world, completely sold out to Satan, who love their sins, who
despise most people, yet professing to ‘love’. Those sins (lust of the eyes,
lust of the flesh, and the ‘pride’ of life [1Jn2:16]) will be carefully guarded and
protected at all cost.
Why else would Jesus,
the most merciful, kindest, and wisest of all say to most of the Pharisees (but
not all), “You are of your father the devil, and the lusts of
your father, you will do. He was a murderer from the beginning and did not
stand in the truth because there is no truth in him.”? [Jn 8:44] He said it
because He knew evil when it stared Him in the face.
Smoldering
Embers
I realize that few people
need me to inform them of such things, but I need to remind myself because I tend
to forget the harsh reality that not everyone walks in compassion, mercy, or
love, even though they may parrot ‘love you’ (as the world has done
for the past decade). It is fleshly, not the love of Christ. I have seen my own heart turn as cold as ice; it is
frightening. I never want to see it again!
It is common to hear
people say ‘love you’ and they do not know you. It has become as common an
expression as ‘have a good day’. That kind of love is made from plastic
materials, not natural ones. Satan is a counterfeiter, a copycat. Satan does
not ‘love’; he hates. He is the father of lies, a master illusionist. However,
if God instructs us to love others, then Satan will follow suit by counterfeiting
– even appearing as an angel of light. [2Cor11:14]
Merciless fires may have once fiercely burned in your heart from the fiery darts of abuse, injustices, betrayal, lies, slander, and deception, whether from the adversary or from people [yes, even Christians], which directly affected your life.
Embers lay silently smoldering
in the dark recesses of the soul, perhaps hidden under a bitter root, or lingering
in the rubble of unforgiveness and pride. Smoldering under the ruins and ashes
remaining from past battles, hidden ambers may be reignited by a such a trial,
as the Almighty God silently stirs up the ashes.
The testing is individually
unique, custom-made for each saint. The more mature we become as sheep, the
closer we walk with Jesus, the more difficult and challenging the tests become.
It seems Jesus has more confidence in you than you have in yourself to put you through such potent and extreme testing.
Houston...we have lift-off! |
I have said before that the trying of our heart is never what we expect, and never what we would choose for ourselves. It may escalate to where it seems like more than we can bear. It will seem cruel because it stretches us beyond measure.
We are sure we will
snap unless the pressure is not lessened. The potency and hardship of it may
seem like we are doomed to fail. The stirring goes deep, and deeper still. Not a
pebble, not one stone is left unturned.
Have you gotten to the point in your walk where you felt confident that you are in God’s will and doing alright? I strongly doubt that there are many Christians that have the attitude that they have ‘arrived’ or are ‘all that’, but they finally began to gain confidence. Nothing wrong with that. Confidence is not pride.
I think I can; I think I can; I think I can...
I knew I could; I knew I could; I knew I could!
All because of Jesus! :)
I can do all
things through Christ who strengthens me! [Phil 4:13] (Confidence!)
Yet, this is a
historical time period. Narcissism in all age groups is increasing at an
alarming rate globally. We were forewarned that the last days would be perilous
times where people would be lovers of self, covetous, unholy, boastful, proud, blasphemers,
etc. [2Tim 3:2-5]
Things seem to be
going steadily along, no drama, a reprieve from spiritual warfare, then,
suddenly, a circumstance happens, or a person comes into your life, and all ‘sinless’
moments flee; all the hard work threatens to come undone; all calm becomes upheaved–
that person or circumstance produces such a negative impact on you that it completely
blindsides you.
Has that happened to
you? Has anything happened in your life that came up suddenly and unexpectedly,
and caught you off-guard? Is there something that has happened that is so personal
that it threatens to destroy all your good fruit, or that brought something out
in you that you did not even know was within, something that was totally
unexpected?
The Accuser
Satan, the accuser lurks in shadows; evil cloaks him. |
You recognize the enemy’s smirk as he hisses, ‘Where is your God now?’ You watch him prowl around like a roaring lion, taunting you, getting ready to devour. Satan snarls, ‘You hate them, do you not? That makes you a murderer in your heart!”
Surprise! I am ba-ack! |
I already felt
unworthy…but the Lord forgave all my past sins. They are under the blood. All
is forgiven…that is, until the next sin. Why, why is sin so easy? I hate this
flesh; just when I think I have overcome, flesh pops out like a ‘jack-in-the-box’,
with a Cheshire cat grin: “Surprise! I am ba-ack!”
As a child of light,
we will grieve at the reality of such discovery. Just when we thought the
hardest test was long over. No further hard testing was expected. It has been a
long, hard life for so many saints, but there is so much to be grateful for, so much to sincerely thank
God for.
What happened? Purging
has loosened hardened dross that was buried so deep and affixed to the heart so
securely that it blended in and appeared as part of the ‘natural’
surroundings. Fastened in place by a camouflage of past insecurities,
rejections, abandonment, outright lies, betrayals – and pride…
The Lord cranks the
heat, seven times hotter [again]. The heat must become so intense that hardened
dross will soften and thus, loosen itself so that it floats to the surface. Once
it ‘surfaces’ we see what the refiner sees, the impurities that must be
skimmed off. What a filthy sight. It is a most uncomfortable, but necessary
process.
Suddenly, we see how
far the fall of mankind was that day in the Garden of Eden. I see the
corruption of my own flesh, which greatly humbles me. The corruption of our
carnal nature became a bottomless pit in the fall of man; irreparable.
Now we clearly see what
is meant by: “[…] …this corruptible must put on incorruptible; and
this mortal must put on immortality.” [1Cor15:52] Only Jesus…! Nothing is
impossible with God.
Others Went
Before Us
Abraham endured multiple
tests – with kings that desired his wife; with Lot choosing the best land between
them; with the capture of Lot by Mesopotamian kings, and his rescue by Abraham
and the army he raised up; pleading for any who may be righteous when judgment
was about to fall upon Sodom and Gomorrah.
However, the prime test,
as we from Abraham’s future know, the hardest and most difficult one was when YHWH
told him to sacrifice his son of promise, Isaac. He obeyed, and the Lord
blessed him by not only sparing Isaac, but by fulfilling His promise to make
Abraham the father of many nations.
And in your seed
shall all the nations of the earth be blessed; because you have obeyed My
voice. [Gen 22:18]
After Joseph’s two
prophetic dreams, along with the many-coloured coat Jacob gave to him (a
sign of his love and favour for Rachel’s firstborn), his jealous brothers
caused Joseph to suffer many things, all of which stemmed from their hatred
(highlighting will be understood shortly).
His many years of
slavery in Egypt brought further suffering and trials, yet there was one final
test that could have ended both his physical life and his right-standing with
God, depending on his choice.
Potiphar’s wife falsely
accused Joseph of attempted rape. Joseph chose well. He did not give in to the alluring temptation,
but fled so quickly that the seductress was left with the garment in her hand,
when she had grabbed hold of him forcefully. His resistance left him free to flee,
but left her to explain why his clothing was in her possession.
Had his master
believed his wife, Joseph would have been executed immediately, but Potiphar
knew Joseph, and he knew his wife as well. To the humiliation of his wife,
instead of a death sentence, Potiphar had the young man imprisoned [Gen 39:20]
The shackles were so
tight they hurt his feet, and the iron collar clamped around his neck was heavy
and too snug. [Ps 105:18] What mixed feelings Joseph must have had. He would
have recognized God’s mercy through Potiphar sparing his life.
Yet, he still had to
suffer punishment for the woman’s attempt at character assassination and
prideful revenge on Joseph with her outright lies. She was humiliated because Potiphar’s
judgment revealed to people that he had doubts about the story his wife told.
How discouraged Joseph
must have been at that point, suffering for rejecting temptation and its seductions,
as well as being faithful/loyal to his earthly master. The test proved Joseph’s
faithfulness to God and his reverential fear of the Lord. [Prov 9:10] God
noticed.
The Lord was
with Joseph, and showed him mercy, and gave him favour in the eyes of the keeper
of the prison. [Gen 39:21]
Mercy was granted by
God a second time, for Joseph was therefore loosed from his shackles and neck
iron by the prison’s keeper, who then put Joseph in charge of the prisoners.
God’s favour came through the keeper.
It should be noted
that God allowed a sinful woman to seemingly get away with her lies and
deception, but He was preparing Joseph further for his destiny. The two
prophetic dreams Joseph had in his youth were about to come true, yet all
Joseph saw around him was hopelessness.
Passing the test of both
the heart condition and his faith brought Joseph El Shaddai’s blessing, in His
perfect timing. In the end, Joseph was freed from slavery, and given a position
in Egypt that was second only to Pharaoh in all of Egypt. [see Gen 41:37-44]
Our faith and hearts
are tried; God knows all about our heart, as well as our faith, but we need to
know.
Hatred in the
Heart is Murder
Hatred in the heart is murder. [1Jn 3:26] |
The corruption of the
fallen nature is endless. Confidence arises as we make headway, step by slow
step in our faith walk, hopeful each time we overcome a stubborn sin, or an
addiction, with the help of Jesus and the gracious Holy Spirit.
I have written about mankind
being in a spiritual war even before being on the net. This is not my
revelation. It is written in the Word of God. (Gen3: Satan, the serpent; Eph6,
2Cor10: updates us; Revelation20:10: the dragon, that ancient serpent, thrown
into the lake of fire) It is a war against God and against His creation,
particularly mankind.
My heart has been offered
out of love for God, and love for people, over the last 17 years on the net, 15
years on this site. I have given my best, and shared my worst, all for the
purpose of pointing people to Christ Jesus, and hopefully showing the way to
salvation, healing, deliverance, restoration, reversals, through Jesus (Yeshua)
alone. Nothing is impossible with God. [Lk 1:37]
In the transparent
sharing of the good, bad, and ugly of myself, a lost soul can see that if Jesus
can save the likes of me, He can save anyone. Hope is found in Jesus,
forgiveness and salvation is readily available now…
Literally, you can
come as you are: salvation is a gift, bought and paid for by the precious blood
of Jesus. If any of us waited until we were ‘good enough’, we
would still be waiting. None of us will ever be good enough in these earthen
vessels. We all need a Saviour. [See John 3:16,17]
Do you know what an
amazing part is? The angels rejoice over you.
Likewise, I say
to you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that
repents. [Lk 25:10]
Yeshua, our precious
Jesus, is the only One who can reconcile us back to a holy God, the only One
whose agape love was sacrificial, the One whose return all the saints
anticipate.
I was sure my testing
was over; there have been plenty of trials, but I was wrong. This last one
threw me. Never did I think I had such ugliness in me because hatred [now
you understand why that word was highlighted previously) is ugliness; it is
sin. It is murder in the heart to God. It will keep us out of an eternal
life with our magnificent Creator, a holy King and Lord.
Whosoever hates his brother is a murderer: and you know that no murderer has eternal
life abiding in him. Hereby we perceive the love of God, because He laid down His life for us: and we ought to lay down
our lives for the brethren.
[1Jn 3:15-16]
Recently, in anger, I
verbalized my feelings aloud to the walls. The sound of my own words resonated
deep within my spirit, and echoed [spiritually] in my ears. It hit me
hard and I instantly broke down in tears. I broke a commandment.
a scribe wanted to know about the first commandment [Mk 12:28] |
A scribe showed up at
one of the gatherings where Jesus was speaking to the people. After a while, he
asked Jesus what the first commandment was.
And Jesus
answered him; The first of all the commandments is, Hear, O Israel; the Lord
our God is one Lord: And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart,
and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength:
this is the first commandment.
And the second
is like this, You shall love your neighbour as yourself. There is no other
commandment greater than these. [Mk 12:28-31]
The scribe agreed
wholeheartedly. He was likely aware of the commandment in Leviticus.
You shall not hate your brother in
your heart: you shall in
no wise rebuke your neighbour, and not suffer sin upon him. You shall not
avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of your people, but you shall
love your neighbour as yourself: I AM the Lord. [Lev 19:17,18]
The word of God came to
mind: [Jesus said]: “[…] out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks.”
[Mat 12:34] My heart pounded. O no, not after all that the Lord and I have
been through; am I going to blow it now?
The choice was mine
to make. Now that the Holy Spirit pointed more out to me, I was without excuse.
My cross was waiting…
The Subtilty of
Deception
It began months ago when I was pointed toward a place as encouragement. At first, I was unsure what was troubling me on that first visit; or what seemed off. I could not pinpoint it. Truth was being presented for the most part, although there were ‘parts’ or ‘pieces’ of a prophetic word that were not fully scriptural; there was a twist. Certain understandings or interpretations seemed inaccurate.
The truth that was
spoken was appreciated, and a comfort, but something seemed wrong. I shrugged
it off, not expecting to think more of it. But I did, something about it was
troubling me and I could not understand what the big deal was.
Why was it affecting
me so much when there was truth being presented? Perhaps the devil was taunting
me, so I had decided to dismiss my thoughts as overthinking, with random negative
thoughts that had to be cast down. [2Cor10:5]
After another month or
so passed, I decided to return. Surely whatever it was would turn out to be
nothing. I desired to be pragmatic. The world is desperate for truth, as I have
said before. So, if truth was there, what was my issue?
I decided that
perhaps it was because there seemed to be mixture. Truth and a sleight of hand,
a slight variation of scripture. Perhaps that was it, I had thought. No,
although there can be no ‘mixture’ in the things of the gospel, there was
something else troubling me.
In going back yet
again in yet another month’s time or more, the presentation hit me, and
suddenly it all became clear. I had been praying about what was bothering me,
and had asked the Lord for help.
My apple cart had
been upset and all the lovely fruit was scattered all over the place. My desire
is to always be in God’s will to the best of my ability [the Lord places
that desire in us, then develops it]. There is a desperation deep within me
to see things as Jesus sees them, which is a pure, untarnished perspective.
When I suddenly
understood what was troubling me all along, I do not know what came first,
shock or denial, as I found the truth of the matter extremely difficult to
believe. I must be wrong. I began to dig deeper.
I prayed that the
Lord would either confirm me, or show me the error of my ways. The Lord did
indeed lead me and revealed the truth to me; however, how I was allowing it to
affect me was threatening to poison the good fruit.
The War Within
This matter goes back to about five months ago now, perhaps longer. As much as I tried to carry on with my life, I was struggling. My writing was affected. Blockage after blockage kept hitting my writing. I could not put anything forward because it is crucial that the Holy Spirit approves what I write, and that for His name’s sake, He leads and guides me. [Ps 31:3]
Until I was certain
of that, so much time kept passing. The Holy Spirit moved on me late February,
early March, to be vigilant in prayer. For as long as I can remember, decades
ago, even before I was committed to the Lord, He started me as an intercessor,
and drove home the importance of prayer.
Consistently, we are
told to watch and pray. The two-part series, ‘Prayer Can Change Anything’ was
birthed from the gentle, yet persistent (daily) urging of the Holy Spirit to pray.
Still, writing was hindered. I tore up one ‘invisible’ page of writing after
another (also known as ‘heavy on the backspace’ or ‘delete’
buttons).
Days kept rolling by,
weeks, and I could not seem to put the articles together easily. Prayer kept
going up. I wanted to be obedient, yet I did not feel like much of a ‘Christian’.
Emotions were raw, and sadly negative.
I needed the Holy
Spirit to be in my words; the anointing had to be there to benefit the readers.
‘Lord, is this you? Are you passing my mantle on? Are you done with me?” Many
nights were restless sleep, and tearful solitude.
Yet deep within my
spirit, I knew the Lord would not answer the folly in my questions, and He did
not. I know my Abba and He knows me. He is far from done with me. Satan is a
liar, and the flesh can whine too much!
Finally, a couple of
months ago, I asked the Lord if I was imagining things or if He was indeed
revealing things to me. More fell into place, and I knew He was exposing the
truth of the matter to me. Now the ball was in my court. What would I do with
the information?
An inner war began between
my emotions and doing what the Word of God instructs us to do. Pick up your
cross and die to ‘self’. It will hurt; there is no comfort when dying. The
enemy taunts; the flesh cries out for mercy. Birth and death are two journeys
done alone.
It is written to pray
for those who do us wrong, just as Job prayed for his three ‘well-meaning’
friends. We know Job was hurt by their accusations and their lack of faith in
him, but we also know that in the end, he obediently prayed to God for them.
[Job 42:8-10]
As with any kind of
loss, the grieving over the matter came in waves. I took it to the Lord. I knew
I had to release it into His hands, and I did – but when the next wave hit, it
was not long before I took it right back. It was not nailed to the [spiritual]
cross – and neither was I.
It is so personal, so
intimate, I did not want to let it go…
I went through a
gamut of emotions, with weeping being the most dominant. However, when anger, bitterness
and hatred caused me to verbalize my feelings with three short, but powerful
words a few days ago, it brought me to an abrupt halt.
The words echoed
loudly all the way through me, until it resonated deep within my spirit. This
had to stop if I am to call myself a child of God. “O Father, I am unworthy
of the precious blood spilled; so much wrong, so much corruption is in my
flesh.” I felt sick in my heart at grieving such a good Father.
Then, to disappoint
the King who time after time goes to bat for us as our Advocate, against the
accuser who can measure enough truth in his accusations to present a valid
case, but his wisdom is no match to that of Jesus the Christ.
For godly grief
produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly
grief produces death. For see what earnestness this godly grief has produced in
you, but also what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear,
what longing, what zeal, what punishment! In all things you have approved
yourselves to be clear in this matter. [2Cor7:10,11]
I had allowed the sins
of another to be the reason behind my sinning; and thereby justify the reason. Well,
that is wrong! The blame is NOT on them. I had to own my own sin because no
one, not even the devil himself, can force us to sin.
He can strongly tempt
us by appealing to the flesh, but he cannot force us to give into that
temptation. I knew in my heart that God loves this person too. That was the
part I had to accept. He was not going to overlook my sin, or justify it for
any reason. Sin is sin.
Shame overtook me as
I realized my sin was no light thing. Murder in the heart is a serious matter;
eternity with Yeshua, my Jesus, could be forever lost. [1Jn 3:15] It was my
call, my choice. (Choose this day whom you will serve.) “It’s not
fair!” I reason, but life itself is not fair. Again, that is no excuse.
I had to face the
excellent King and Lord of my life. Words were not readily upon my lips. There
was no excuse for my reaction. I was to be self-controlled (one of the
fruits of the Holy Spirit); to walk humbly with God; to love Him, and to
love my neighbour as myself.
I was not loving
myself too much at the time, but feelings do not define me. Feelings and
emotions can betray us, deceive us; they can let us down. My sins of spiteful
anger, bitterness and hatred did grieve the Holy Spirit indwelling in me.
There is a cross to
bear. It was up to me to pick up mine, and surrender to the perfect will of the
Creator. There was sin that had to be nailed to it. My arms had to be open upon
my own cross in order to be wholly washed in the Lamb’s blood. Then, when I
prayed, the Sovereign Lord brought a story to my remembrance.
The Wisdom of
God
Two women went before Solomon, both claiming that the one baby was theirs, each insisting that it was the ‘other’ woman who had rolled over on her baby when it was three days old and accidentally killed it. They both lived in the same house.
The woman whose baby
died had switched babies with the woman whose son was alive, whilst the mother
was asleep at night. They both went before the king to solve the problem. Both showed
determination that the child was theirs, and that the other woman was
lying.
There was no DNA
testing available in those days; however, Solomon was known for his great
wisdom. He demanded a sword, and stated that he would cut the child in half,
and give each mother half the baby.
One mother approved
the king’s judgment, proclaiming that the baby should neither be hers or the
other woman’s child. “Divide it,” she agreed. But the other woman cried
out to the king not to slay the child, but to let it live by giving it to the
other mother.
Immediately Solomon
knew who the genuine and true mother was when she tearfully revealed that she
would rather surrender her child to another so that her son could live, than to
have the child killed. He gave the child to the real mother.
And all Israel
heard of the judgment which the king had judged; and they feared the king: for
they saw that the wisdom
of God was in him, to do
judgment. [1Kings 3:16-28]
Call to
Repentance, Be Holy, A Warning
I understood what the
Holy Spirit was saying. Everything belongs to the Lord; it is His to give and
His to take. Shame consumed me. I was so grieved in my heart, so ashamed of myself
for allowing hatred to manifest in the core of my being, that I knew I had to
get down on my knees and repent.
We are to be holy as God
is holy. Holy – taken from the Hebrew word ‘kadosh’. According to one study, it means ‘separated’,
and ends meaning ‘special’, ‘sacred’, ‘elevated’. I had learned long ago that to
be ‘holy’ meant ‘set apart’, which was understood as ‘set
apart from the world, and under the leadership of the Shepherd, the Lord God’.
Without going into
depth here about ‘being holy’, my desire was to confess my sin and to turn away
from it, die to self (crucify the flesh/carnal nature), and to humbly
ask God to forgive me. In order to be forgiven, I knew I had to forgive. In
order to forgive for real, hatred had to be replaced by love. For love to rule
once again, I had to genuinely pray for the soul of the one who I was offended
by.
Let all
bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away
from you, with all malice: And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving
one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you. [Eph4:31,32]
Everything God does
is done decently and in order. To do this right, I had to follow God’s
protocol, which is written clearly throughout the Bible. I needed the help of
the Holy Spirit. Godly sorrow consumed me, and the Lord Himself drew me with a spirit
of repentance. I had to humble myself before a holy God, my Abba, by getting
down on my knees to pray.
For godly sorrow
works repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the
world works death. [2Cor 7:10]
I was unsure if I
could even get down on my knees because I do not have any cartilage in either
knee; it is bone on bone. I walk with a cane. Yet, we serve a magnificent God,
and He does see the heart. It should have been more painful getting down on my
knees, but it was not.
Yes, I was being
careful and slow, but there was no pain. The Lord helped me down. It took a few
minutes to settle my tears. I was in the presence of a holy God who loved the
other person just as much as He loved me, and I had to really get that down in
my heart.
Once I did, my sin
was confessed in all humility, and I asked for forgiveness. The story of Job (yes)
was then brought to my remembrance by the Holy Spirit at this point, which is
why Job was mentioned previously. If we say that we love God, then we must
accept His chastening, His correction – and His discipline. He is good, and His
mercy truly does endure.
Once I prayed in all
sincerity for the person, the hatred melted away under the flood of love that
came rushing in. ONLY Jesus! When I was done, it seemed the Lord lifted me up
because as I pushed on the mattresses of my bed to help me up, it seemed no
real effort, which is not common when one has no cartilage in their knees. Such
is the kindness and grace of the Lord.
There was one more
thing I had to do. We are to be accountable to the brethren for our behaviour,
for sins. It took several starts, due to numerous ‘deletes’, but I
finally managed to text a beloved sister in Christ, and a treasured and close
friend.
She is the beloved soul who originally sent me to the site months ago, with the intention of encouraging
me. Her motive was pure. I had voiced my concern months back, and even then,
she stood by me in prayer like the beautiful saint of God that she is.
In all humility, I poured
out my heart by making confession of my shameful sin. There was no sugarcoating
or whitewashing, no justifying or excusing on my part. As I saw the reality of
my sin put into words, I broke down yet again in tears.
It was important to
give God glory, and I hope I managed to do that when I explained getting down
on my knees. I cannot remember if I told her that I prayed for the person or
not, but I do know the reason now behind taking these necessary steps.
Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that you may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer
of a righteous man avails much. [Jam 5:18]
My friend sent words
of comfort, and promised to pray for me. I believe she did because of the peace
that passes all understanding that has now enveloped me. Now I am no longer
troubled by what I was troubled by. I exalt Jesus the Christ (Messiah) on high!
As hard as it was to
confess my sins to anyone, it had to be done. And even to the dear readers that
come to this site. If anything is troubling the heart of a reader, I pray that
this testimony re-enforces the truth of the faithfulness, love and discipline of
the Lord.
If we are His, He
will discipline us…and I am so grateful. I need His correction; we all do if we
go astray. I can promise you He will not disappoint. Things may not be
understood as He does His work, but if you can practice patience and ‘wait’
upon the Lord, He comes through, in perfect ways, and perfect timing.
The Lord goes ahead of us always. If we find ourselves tangled in a thorny thicket on a narrow ledge, halfway down a steep cliff, the Good Shepherd will find us and rescue us.
It is understood now why the Lord had me prepare a two-part series over six weeks ago. The first part was posted March 15, and today, as I write this post, it is April 17, 2023.
He was ahead of me by a tad over a month. He knew how He was going to correct me, and He knew precisely how to order the steps. The mini-series is appropriately called: Prayer
Can Change Anything
Only God can
orchestrate such a thing; He is a God of order. I did not clue in at the time,
but He truly does order our steps. To God alone be the glory, who, as a holy and
righteous Father, and as a Good Shepherd, will correct and discipline, then forgive,
heal and cleanse.
If we confess
our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say that we have
not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His Word is not in us. [1Jn 1:9,10]
This testimony was given out of love to show those who may stumble in the time of trying the heart and our faith, that to obey God [His Word] and Jesus’ leading, will give you the strength to rise back up again [Prov 24:16] (face your sin, confess it, and discover the grace and mercy of the Lord for yourself!)
It was also given
because I am accountable and responsible to the body of Christ [Col 3:13; Gal
6:3]
But the most
important reason for the testimony dear reader, is to glorify God through His
Son Yeshua (my Jesus). I am but one ‘today’ witness [modern-day]
who testifies to the truth of God’s Word, and to the faithfulness, mercy and
grace of the Redeemer, Jesus/Yeshua.
I testify to you,
dear soul, that the Lord changes not [Mal 3:6]; He is the same yesterday,
today, and forever [Heb 13:8], AND He is good; His
steadfast love and His mercy endures forever! [Ps 136:1-26]
Perhaps now it is
understood why articles were so scanty thus far, but the Lord did say, it is
not a competition. We can relax and leave the outcome of anything in His competent
hands.
This article was not
planned, but when a site belongs to the Lord, it should be expected. May the
reader be blessed, and the Lord glorified!
I do have the article, Judgement Comes from the North almost done. It looks like it is a two-part series too. Should have it up ‘hopefully’ on Friday (best not to
hold your breath though lol – life has a way of ‘getting in the way’)
A prophetic word is
going to be shared now, written on April 2, 2023. It is when I was still struggling
with many emotions, confusion, and a feeling of ‘unworthiness’. You will get a
sense of how the Lord was weaving the tapestry beautifully.
[Message begins]
April 2, 2023
My hand
stays [stops/overpowers] the actions of mankind, if I so choose.
Justice
is turned back, and righteousness stands far away: for truth has stumbled in
the public squares, and uprightness cannot enter. Truth is lacking, and he who departs
from evil makes himself a prey. The Lord saw it, and it displeased Him that there was no justice. [Is59:14-15]
Deception
is carried out openly, for there are those who think that if they use My name
and My word [scriptures] that I will overlook the ways they are deceiving My
people. Yet My people will see clearly when they open themselves up by humbling
themselves before Me, wholly prostrate spiritually, fully surrendered. They
have learned and do their best to practice bringing all things to Me, especially
if there is any doubt.
I lift up
the humble, and subdue the proud.
Bitter
tears have been the portion of My dedicated people as they travail over the
condition of the world and of the flesh, including their own flesh (a daily
battle). They especially grieve over brethren who have compromised, gone astray
for their own reputation, for their own gain, for their own name’s sake.
There are
those who come in My name, and with false humility and forced tears, they
deceive the multitudes by grand illusion and theatrics. I have given them room
to repent, but so far, they have not.
Those who
are Mine have wrestled strongly with flesh to lay aside pride, asking for My
light to expose anything in them that is not of Me. If a thought, word or deed
is exposed, a spirit of repentance is welcomed, as their broken and contrite
heart falls into My righteous hands, their Potter – He who breaths life into
each vessel. They are brought to repentance by My love for them.
They
wait…they wait…they wait upon Me.
Stolen words
do no justice, for if the fruit is stolen, then the sweetness turns from
organic to artificial. Unless they repent, they will be amongst those who
question Me:
Many
will say to Me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name?
and in Your name have cast out devils? And in Your name done many wonderful
works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from Me, you
that work iniquity. [Mat
7:22-23]
You used My
name, and You spoke the words I spoke, but they were [rhema] words I spoke to
another, one who sought Me in prayer, and at times, with fasting. Have you
humbled yourself to seek Me before you went forth with My words, and even used
those written in the Holy Scriptures?
Your
interpretations are wrong: you bring false hope to tickle the ears of the
listeners. You speak of the future as if you know it, and even dare to change
the way I said things [in My logos – My written Word]. I do not delight in a
falling away, but would rather that all should come to repentance.
Therefore,
My patience is often mistaken for leniency and ‘nonjudgmental’ ways. It
is misinterpreted as ‘blessing’ and ‘mercy’, when in fact it is My patience, as
I wait for you to acknowledge your thievery and repent.
You who are
offended, will you stand in the gap and pray for those who have stolen from
you? Will you intercede for the lost soul, or will your heart wax cold? You who
discerned rightly, do you pray for the false prophet to change? Do you pray for
justice for the one whose life’s work was trampled upon?
You who are
offended, you speak of trust. Will you now trust Me to handle this situation in
due season, as surely as Solomon handled the situation of the two women who
both claim a baby was their own? When that which is yours is returned to you,
will you add to the shame of the other, or will you stand in the gap and pray
for the wayward soul?
Yes, I
understand how difficult some things are to the flesh, but I have done good
work in you. Let now your spirit overcome your flesh in that ‘dying to self’.
You can and will do this, I know the heart I formed in you. I see how you
strive to obey and remain in My will.
He saw that there was no man, and wondered that there was no one to intercede. Then His own arm brought Him salvation, and His righteousness upheld him.
He put
on righteousness as a breastplate, and a helmet of salvation upon His head: He
put on garments of vengeance for clothing, and wrapped Himself in zeal as a
cloak. According to their deeds, so He will repay, wrath to His adversaries,
repayment to His enemies: to the coastlands He will render repayment.
So they
shall fear the name of the Lord from the west, and His glory from the rising of
the sun [east]; for He will come like a rushing stream, which the wind of the
Lord drives.
And a Redeemer
will come to Zion, to those in Jacob who turn from transgression, declares the
Lord. [Is 59:16-20]
For a long time now, a clarion call went out to those who would hear and come to Me. I in them, and they in Me. Deep calls out to deep – hold fast to Me, and to My Word, and by My Spirit and Word you shall know how to go, for I AM the Good Shepherd who faithfully leads My sheep upon the right path. [Prov 3:5-6]
For God
so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believes
in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God sent not His Son
into the world to condemn the world; but that the world THROUGH HIM (Jesus/Yeshua) might
be saved.
He that
believes on Him is not condemned: but he that believes not is condemned
already, because he has not believed in the NAME of the ONLY begotten
Son of God. And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world,
and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil.
[Jn 3:16-19]
For the
Lord is not slack concerning His promise as some men count slackness, but is
longsuffering
(patient) toward us, not willing that any should perish, but
that all should come to repentance. [2Pet3:9]
[End of
message]
I added the rest later that same day after prayer...trying to get myself to do the right thing, talking to myself in the words below...So, if anything above has repeated what is written below, that would be why. The message from the Lord was over two weeks ago. He is so patient. What a good, good Father!
Whether
saved or unsaved, SIN separates us from God. Yes, there are saved people who
sin: it could be thoughts, cruel words or lies, or dishonest actions. A
repentant heart must be kept, ready to turn away from such things.
I was
guilty of sins – bitterness, anger, hatred, pride. Nothing justifies that in a
child of God. The cross was before me. I had to pick it up and die to selfishness.
It was never about me, but exalting the majesty of our King.
I came into
this world with nothing, and I shall leave with nothing. (Thank you for the
lesson, Job.) It is not my work, it is His… And this is HIS work in me, in
us – He begins it, and He carries it on to completion until the day of Jesus
Christ. [Phil 1:6]
There is no
resurrection power without a death first. Flesh fights us. It wants down off
the cross, but the Holy Spirit helps us.
He corrects His own; it is not for me to guess, or to suggest, or to
dare counsel – heaven forbid.
Hatred melted away under the brilliance of
the pure love of Jesus. Flesh was dying. Bitterness was destroyed when
the crushing power of forgiveness overtook it. I too needed forgiveness – have Your
way, Lord.
Anger was replaced by love when sincere
prayer went up for the person. And pride, o yes, that subtle enemy of our soul.
Pride was obliterated and replaced by humility when I saw into the spiritual
and observed the power and glory of the agape love of Jesus envelope that other
soul.
His
sacrifice upon the cross was for that one too. You shall know the truth and the
truth shall set you free. [Jn 8:32] Our Maker will take care of it. I wait upon
Him. I have finally let it go, after all these months. Thank You Jesus. My spirit rejoices, and thanksgiving goes to
the Lord! I could NOT have done it without Him – glorious Shepherd.
Call out to
God who is an ever-present help in trouble. He is faithful. I speak from
firsthand experience and knowledge. He begins the work; He completes it, but He
will not force Himself upon us, nor will He force us to desire Him! Those of us
who love Him do so because He loved us first. [Jn 4:19]
He instructs
us in what to do. He helps us if we want to forgive a person, but struggle due
to hurt and emotions. I need to be forgiven, so I must forgive. My friend, open
your hand to the Lord and let Him take that pain; do not hang onto it. It will
eventually crush you. It will paralyze you to the point where you cannot rise
up and move onward.
Do not
allow the enemy to have that power over you. Trust God to handle the human
aspect. Jeremiah spoke of God’s displeasure with those who took words from
others and called them their own. Patience in such matters is difficult, but
look away from the pride and arrogance of that soul, and … PRAY for them. It is
hard at first, getting started, but as we determine to do God’s will, it begins
to flow.
No person
alive wants danger or trouble in their lives, but since the Garden of Eden,
since the day of Eve’s deception and Adam’s disobedience, since the day Cain
killed Able, sin tore mankind apart down through the ages, separating us from
God, without hope …until God sent Jesus into the world. Immanuel – God with us!
Jesus
Christ (Yeshua Mashiach) is the ONLY way back to a holy God. He gave up
His life, His family, everything…in order to be crucified, buried and
resurrected, in order to reconcile us back to the Father, the holy, righteous,
Sovereign God.
We cannot
wait until the day we are ‘good enough’ because that day never comes – for any of us. None of us are ‘good enough’.
And
Jesus said unto him, Why do you call Me good? There is none good but one, that
is, God. [Mk 10:18]
Although
Jesus was God in the flesh, His point was that goodness only comes forth from
God, not man.
Now is the
time.
Repent, be
holy, a warning
Rise up, warrior…
Forgive,
dear saint…
Offer up
the sacrifice of thanksgiving, child of light…
Having done all stand – watch and pray, overcomer…
Presence of His glory
Bonita dovesofthevalleys4@gmail.com
Addendum:
Sabotage - this will be spoken of again. It began with a sister in Christ having a dream about a Siamese cat named 'Sabotage', back in 2017. The Lord has brought it up a few times since. We have seen sabotage in action, but the powers that be are not done yet.
King Charles' coronation is in two weeks, three days - the man who has stood beside Klaus Schwab all these years, and the one who spoke of a great amount of money 'needed' for the 'one' who is going to set things in order (paraphrased). Nearly every Christian listening discerned 'who' he was speaking of.
The 'great tribulation' has been mentioned several times in the past few years. It would have to be checked but it was some years ago that 'the beginning of sorrows' was mentioned. The travailing of the saints and the groaning for Christ's return amongst the brethren leads me to think we are experiencing birth pangs.
Sins in the church and the government is a folder I have on my desktop and something I have been working on for some time. It is expounded upon in an upcoming article. Waves Are Rolling In is another article in the queue...it is all up to the Lord. There are many voices...may we discern the true with the help of the Holy Spirit.
I know Easter or "Resurrection Sunday" is past, but I have some interesting news. So much has been delayed but I wait upon the Lord...it is all I can do.
You will keep him in perfect peace, who mind is stayed on You: because he trusted in You. [Is 26:3]